Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The early table shows changes in the higher community of New York city from years about 1800 to 2000.The second and third tables show almost same data changes in the population of five districts include (Manhattan,Brooklyn,Bronx,Queens and also Staten island).
Overall the table shows change in population there are rise in 2000 year and after that population is dramatically low in year about 18000 in this year the population about 79216 and rise up to 8,009,185 in year about 2000.
On the other hand other two tables show similar data there are five different districts of America according to data Manhattan is at the top while other four are low and remains same in Manhattan there are less population in year 1800 and after that the population is higher in year about 2000 almost 1,538,096.
The other and last table also show rise in society of four district according to table this four district are equal there are high level in 2000 year and low level in 1800.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response attempts to summarize the data but fails to provide a clear or accurate overview. The main features are not effectively highlighted, and there is significant confusion in the interpretation of the data (e.g., the mention of '18000' as a year). The comparison between the districts is vague, using terms like 'high level' and 'low level' without referencing the specific figures provided in the tables. To improve, you must focus on identifying the most significant trends, such as the overall growth of NYC and the relative population sizes of the districts, while using the provided data to support these observations accurately.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression of ideas is weak. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inappropriate, such as the repetitive use of 'the table shows' and 'according to table'. The referencing is often unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the different time periods and districts. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'consequently', 'in contrast', 'furthermore') and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus that contributes to the overall summary.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often imprecise. Phrases like 'higher community' and 'rise in society' are not appropriate for describing demographic data. There is also a reliance on basic, repetitive language. To achieve a higher band, you should use more precise terminology related to data analysis, such as 'population growth', 'significant increase', 'demographic trends', and 'proportion'. Additionally, ensure that you use terms that accurately reflect the data provided in the tables rather than generic descriptions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. For example, 'there are rise in 2000 year' should be 'there was a rise in the year 2000'. Many sentences are fragmented or lack the necessary complexity to demonstrate a range of structures. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and ensuring that verb tenses are consistent when describing historical data. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect prepositions will also help improve clarity.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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