Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table describes data on population of New York city from 1800 to 2000. The second and third table illustrate the changes in the number of residents during the same period among five districts.
Overall, the citizen of New York increased significantly by the year 2000. The proportion of highest number of people was from Manhattan in 1800, however it has declined by the end of 2000. The other four districts accept Manhattan has counted for least population in the year of 1800, while it counted highest by the end of period.
In 1800, the population of New York was 79,216 with 60,515 in Manhattan, followed by 18,701 in other four districts. The Manhattan showed 1,850,093 number of people along with 1,587,109 in Brooklyn, Bronx, Staten island with total of 3,437,202 New York's population in the year of 1900. Lastly, in 2000 New York reached at top and showed 8,009,185 citizen, along with 1,538,096 in Manhattan, followed by 6,471,089 of other four districts.
In the beginning, the Manhattan accounted of highest proportion from total population with 76%, followed by 53%, and 19% by the end of 2000, while Other four districts showed 24% in 1800, continued with 46% and 81% by the end.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth and the shift in distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat mechanical and lacks a clear, analytical overview. While the key trends are identified, the comparison between the districts is slightly confusing due to the grouping of 'other four districts' as a single entity, which obscures the individual district data provided in the tables. The summary of percentages in the final paragraph is a good attempt at synthesis, but the overall presentation of data could be more precise to better highlight the significant shifts over the two-century period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes repetitive or slightly unnatural, such as 'The other four districts accept Manhattan has counted for least population'. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when referring to the 'other four districts' as a collective group. While there is a clear progression from an overview to specific data points, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect the trends more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There are several instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'citizen of New York increased' (should be 'population') and 'reached at top'. The term 'citizen' is used incorrectly to refer to the total number of residents. While the student successfully uses some numerical data, the range of vocabulary is limited, and there is a reliance on basic descriptors. To reach a higher band, the student should use more sophisticated collocations and avoid repetitive structures when describing trends.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'The second and third table illustrate' (subject-verb agreement error), 'The other four districts accept Manhattan has counted for least population' (incorrect word choice and grammar), and 'Manhattan accounted of highest proportion' (incorrect preposition). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence construction often feels clunky. The student needs to focus on subject-verb agreement, correct preposition usage, and more accurate sentence formation to improve the overall quality of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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