Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given tables shows the information about changes in the overall population of New York city from 1800 to 2000 and other 2 tables illustrates the changes in the population of the five districts of the New York city over the same period. It is noticeable that population was increased over a given period.
To begin with, population of New York in 1800 was just 79216. which was increased and reached at [redacted phone] in 2000 it seem that it was massive increased during the given period of time.
Manhattan has highest proportion of population over the given 5 district it was 76% in 1800 . Whereas, other 4 districts contributes only 24% in 1800. On the other hand, in 2000, the ratio of the Manhattan district was deep down it was just 19% , however, the other four districts proportion of total proportion had grown up and reached at 81% in 2000.
Overall, Manhattan had highest proportion of total population in 1800.However, In 2000, the other four districts had a highest population of the proportion.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the data, such as the overall population growth and the shift in the proportion of residents living in Manhattan versus the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For instance, the report fails to mention the specific population figures for the individual districts in 2000, focusing only on percentages. Furthermore, the summary lacks a clear overview of the trends for the other districts individually, which were provided in the tables. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that all parts of the data are represented and that comparisons are more detailed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'To begin with' is used to introduce the second paragraph, but it does not logically follow the introduction. Additionally, there are issues with referencing, such as 'other 2 tables' and 'other 4 districts', which feel repetitive. The flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed, making the progression of ideas feel slightly forced rather than natural.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'increased', 'proportion', and 'population'. There are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'ratio of the Manhattan district was deep down' and 'had a highest population of the proportion', which are unnatural and imprecise. To improve, you should aim to use more varied synonyms for growth (e.g., 'surged', 'experienced a significant rise') and ensure that your terminology for statistical data is accurate.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('The given tables shows', 'population was increased') and punctuation errors, such as the misplaced period in '79216. which'. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences often contain errors that impede clarity. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of basic grammatical mistakes prevents the response from reaching a higher band. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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