Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table depicts the overall population of New York City's five districts between 1800 and 2000 while the next two tables show the same changes separately.
Overall, the key feature is that the number of people increased dramatically in the New York. Moreover, even though the number of residents in Manhattan increased over the years, the percentage of total population dropped for this area while the other fours witnessed dramatic increment in both population and per percentage data.
In the New York City's all five districts the population had increased significantly from the year 1800 around 79,216 to more than 8,00,000 in 2000.The Manhattan had the highest percentage of total population(76%) which is almost one third of the total(76%) in 1800 while the other four states(Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) was less than 30%. Additionally, in 1900 Manhattan was almost a half proportion(54%) while the others were less than a half(46%).
Conversely, the dominance of numbers reversed in the final year 2000 when Manhattan proportion decreased to less than 20% while the other four districts were noted as high as 81% which was the highest recorded data in the whole chart.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the data, including the overall population growth and the shift in distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccuracies in data interpretation. For instance, you state the population in 1800 was 'around 79,216' and then 'more than 8,00,000' in 2000, which is correct, but the claim that Manhattan's population was 'almost one third' of the total in 1800 is mathematically inconsistent with your own figure of 76%. Additionally, referring to the districts as 'states' is factually incorrect. While the main trends are identified, the precision of the reporting needs improvement to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'Conversely' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some referencing is unclear, such as the phrase 'the other fours witnessed dramatic increment in both population and per percentage data'. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the transition between the general population trend and the specific district data could be smoother. Overall, the information is arranged coherently, but the use of cohesive devices is not always flexible or natural.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'depicts', 'witnessed', and 'dominance'. However, there are some word choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'dramatic increment' (instead of 'increase') and 'per percentage data'. The use of 'states' to describe the districts of New York is a significant lexical error. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that collocations are natural. The range is sufficient to convey the main points, but the lack of precision in terminology limits the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'In the New York City's all five districts' (incorrect article usage and word order) and 'the other four states... was less than 30%' (subject-verb agreement error). Additionally, the use of '8,00,000' is non-standard formatting for numbers in English. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to suggest a lack of control over more complex structures. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and article usage will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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