Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The table illustrates the changes in the total population of New York City and other tables shows the change in the percentage of population of five different district from the year 1800 to 2000.
In the city New York, there was a drastic change in the population. In the year 1800, the population was around 79,216 which increased and became 3,437,202 in the year 1900 and further increased to 8,009,185 in the year 2000. 76% of the total population resided in Manhattan which was equal to 60,515 which increased to 1,850,093 in the year 1990 with 54% of the total population and at last in the year 2000, it decreased and became 1,538,096 with 19% of the total population.
In other districts including Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten island had 24% of the total population with 18,701 in year 1800 and 46% of the total population equal to 1,587,109 in the year and at last with 81% of the total population with 6,471,089 in the year 2000.
In conclusion, there was a drastic change in the population of New York City and other districts including Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main trends in the total population and the shifts in district percentages. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you mention the total population figures, the breakdown of the five districts is handled by grouping them into 'Manhattan' versus 'other districts', which misses the opportunity to compare the individual growth patterns of Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island as presented in the data. The summary of the data is accurate, but it lacks a clear overview or a more nuanced comparison of the shifting proportions between the districts over the two centuries. To improve, ensure you highlight the most significant changes, such as the relative decline of Manhattan's share compared to the rapid growth of the outer boroughs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes mechanical. The use of cohesive devices is limited, and some transitions feel repetitive (e.g., 'In the year...'). The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the third paragraph where the phrase 'in the year' is left incomplete, which disrupts the flow of information. To reach a higher band, use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader through the data comparison.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You rely heavily on basic terms like 'change', 'increased', and 'total population'. While these are accurate, they do not demonstrate a wide range of lexical items. There are also some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'at last in the year 2000', which is not the most natural way to introduce a final data point. Incorporating more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends and statistics would enhance the quality of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For instance, 'other tables shows' should be 'other tables show', and 'In other districts including... had' is grammatically incorrect as it lacks a proper subject. There are also issues with missing information, such as 'in the year' appearing without a specific date. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring all sentences are complete.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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