Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
There is a table that provide information about the population growth in new York city from 1800 to 2000. Another two tables gives information about the population increase of the 5 different districts in the same period.
First of all, there are total number of three tables, first one is about the new York city and second table is about Manhattan city, and last one is for the other districts like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten island. All tables mention the same era, but talk about the different cities. The population of new York city in 1800 is 79,216 and in next two centuries jump around 10x.
The next two tables highlight population in percentage. The tables give the digits that increase yearly, but the Manhattan district's population decrease rapidly with comparison to the total population. From 1900 to 2000 the population of all district increase by twice.
To sum up, the all three tables
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to adequately address the task. While it mentions the tables, it does not provide a clear summary of the main features or trends. The data provided is sparse and inaccurate; for example, stating the population 'jump around 10x' is a vague description of the data. Furthermore, the response is incomplete, ending abruptly with 'To sum up, the all three tables', which means the overview and key comparisons are missing. The analysis of the district population percentages is also confusing and lacks the necessary detail to demonstrate a clear understanding of the provided information. To improve, you must select key data points and describe the trends clearly.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The response is poorly organised and lacks a logical flow. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the ideas within the paragraphs are disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often mechanical, such as 'First of all' and 'To sum up'. The final sentence is an incomplete fragment, which severely disrupts the coherence of the text. Referencing is also unclear, as the writer refers to 'Manhattan city' and 'other districts' in a way that does not accurately reflect the provided data. Improved paragraph structure and a wider range of linking words are required to guide the reader through the information.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits the ability to describe the data precisely. Phrases like 'give the digits' and 'increase by twice' are imprecise and do not reflect the academic tone required for Task 1. There are also errors in word choice, such as referring to Manhattan as a 'city' rather than a district. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the information effectively. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'accounted for', and 'proportion'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'table that provide', 'tables gives'), missing articles (e.g., 'in new York city'), and incorrect sentence structures. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent. The incomplete final sentence is a significant error that affects the overall grammatical integrity of the piece. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and using articles correctly before proper nouns and geographical locations.
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