Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The table illustrate that the total popover of New York city from 1800 to 2000. The second and third table shows changes in the population of the the five district of the city over the same period of time.We can discuss on several topics in following paragraph.
Firstly, In New York city population was 79,216 in the 1800. In the next year 1900 it increases up to 3,437,202. In the year 2000 it touches to the sky population about 8,009,185.
Secondly, Manhattan had the population 60,515 in the year 1800 is total to 76% populations. Compare to other district like Brooklyn, Bron, Cueens , staten Island. It would be 1800 of the year population is 18,701 and 24% is total. 54% in the year 1900 and population is 1,850,093 in manhattan. In other state it would be 1,587,109 and 46% in the same year.In 2000 it is 1,538,096 with 19% of the total population. Same other district increases 81% compare to Manhattan
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response attempts to address the task but fails to provide a clear overview or a logical summary of the main trends. While it mentions the total population and some district data, the information is presented in a fragmented and often inaccurate manner. For example, the claim that Manhattan had 76% of the population in 1800 is not clearly supported by the data provided, and the comparison between districts is confusing. The response lacks a clear selection of key features, and the data interpretation is inconsistent, leading to a failure to fully address the requirements of the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and often misused, such as 'Secondly' followed by a confusing list of statistics. The referencing is unclear; for instance, the phrase 'In other state' is used incorrectly to refer to the other four districts. The lack of clear transitions between the total population data and the district-specific data makes the report difficult to follow. The overall structure is disjointed, and the relationship between the ideas is not clearly established.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, often relying on basic structures. There are several instances of inaccurate word choice and spelling errors, such as 'popover' instead of 'population', 'Bron' instead of 'Bronx', and 'Cueens' instead of 'Queens'. The phrasing 'touches to the sky' is inappropriate for an academic report, which requires a formal and objective tone. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data with precision, and the errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding of the specific figures being discussed.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('The table illustrate', 'The second and third table shows'), incorrect article usage ('the the five district'), and awkward sentence construction ('In 2000 it is 1,538,096 with 19% of the total population'). The range of grammatical structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with errors in tense and preposition usage. These persistent errors, combined with the lack of complex structures, significantly hinder the accuracy of the report.
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