Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The population change of New work city in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and staten island over the years 1800, 1900 to 2000 induvidually and as a whole is illustrated in the 2nd, 3rd and 1st paragraph, with additional porportion of total population information is also provided in later two paragraphs. The units for the total population is calibrated in number while population of particular district in terms of total number is expressed as percentage.
overall, the total population of New work city continuously rising up with passage of time showing remarkable increase within a decade in all five districts of New york city. During 1800's Manhattan city contains large number of population which altered reaching 2000 where other districts o showed reversal on proportion of induviduals residing there.
To start with, during 1800 overall populati- on of New york city was well under hundrce thousands which took a shoot up to being three almost force and half millions in 1900 which further grew up reaching eight millions in 2000 with beginings of 2,000.
Secondly, while Manhattan city convits over third quartar of total population compared to just under quartar porportion in other di strict in 1800 where population was well under hundred thousand in both. with arrival of 1900, no of public residing in Manhattan being near to two millions were over one a half million in other district with percentage comprising about 54 percent and 46 percent respectively. Trend changes reaching to 2000, wher population of around 2 two million reduced to one and half in Manhattan where increased drastically to around 6 six and half million in around 4 districts with porportion increase to 81 per cent in other districts comparing to 19 percent in Manhattan.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main trends in the population data, but the analysis is hampered by significant inaccuracies in interpreting the figures. For example, the claim that the population was 'well under hundred thousands' in 1800 is incorrect based on the provided data, and the description of the 1900 figures is confusing and mathematically inconsistent. While the response attempts to highlight the shift in population distribution between Manhattan and the other districts, the lack of clarity in reporting the data points prevents a higher score. The summary is present, but the key features are not accurately or clearly communicated.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is frequently disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward phrasing. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To start with' and 'Secondly', but they are often followed by sentences that are difficult to follow. The transition between the total population data and the district-specific percentages is disjointed. The use of pronouns and referencing is sometimes ambiguous, making it difficult for the reader to track which data point is being discussed. Overall, the structure is present but lacks the necessary flow for a higher band.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'New work', 'induvidually', 'porportion', 'hundrce', 'convits') and word choice issues (e.g., 'took a shoot up', 'beginings of 2,000'). The student struggles to use precise terminology for describing trends, relying on informal or non-standard phrases. While the meaning is generally discernible, the high frequency of errors in spelling and collocation significantly impacts the quality of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a high density of grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues, incorrect verb tenses, and faulty sentence structures. For instance, 'Manhattan city contains large number' and 'no of public residing in Manhattan being near to two millions'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and apostrophes. While there is an attempt to use complex sentences, they are often poorly constructed and contain errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. A wider range of error-free structures is needed.
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