Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This all the tables illustrates the information a total population of New York City and five districts in the New York from 1800 to 2000.
Overall, The first table gives the information all five districts in the New York. In 2000, the largest population increase in this year, it's stood up 8,009,185. The second table the Manhattan city gives the population information and the largest population in the year of 1900, it reached is 1,850,093, Similarly, In 1800, a largest percentage of total population is 76%. However, other districts, In 2000, the largest population and percentage of total population in this year and population it stood up 6,471,089, than percentage is approximately, 81%.
In addition, the New York city all five districts, In 1800, the popluation in this year is 79,216. than, In 1900, the population reached is 3,437,202. Initially, In the Manhattan city, In 1800, the population is stood 60,515 and percentage 76% but In 2000, the population it's approximatly 1,538,096 and percentage is 19%. As well as, Other districts population in the year of 1800, is 18,701 and percentage is 24%. In 1900, the population is 1,587,109 and percentage is 46%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the data, but it fails to clearly identify the main trends or make meaningful comparisons. The information is presented in a fragmented way, often listing figures without explaining the underlying patterns (e.g., the dramatic growth of the total population or the shift in population distribution from Manhattan to the other districts). Some data points are misstated or confusingly phrased, such as the claim about the 'largest population increase' in 2000. To improve, you should focus on grouping data logically—such as comparing the total growth against the growth of individual districts—rather than simply listing numbers from the tables.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear logical progression. While there are attempts at paragraphing, the internal structure of the paragraphs is disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as the repetitive use of 'In 1800' or 'In 2000' to start sentences, which creates a list-like effect rather than a cohesive narrative. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the different districts and time periods. Improving the use of transition signals and ensuring each paragraph has a clear thematic focus would significantly enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You rely heavily on basic structures like 'the population is' or 'the largest population'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'it's stood up' and 'than percentage is', which are not natural English expressions. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'surged', 'declined', 'accounted for', or 'proportion', and ensure that these terms are used accurately in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are persistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'This all the tables illustrates'), incorrect verb tenses, and awkward sentence construction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary commas and capitalization errors. The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structure, ensuring correct verb forms, and reducing the frequency of errors in basic grammar, which will allow you to move toward more complex sentence forms.
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