Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table provides the information about fluctuations in the population density of New York City for two centuries from 1800 to 2000. While the other two tables reports the changes in proportion of population of the five regions i.e Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island of the town over the same timespan.
Overall, the total number of residents all around the city has gradually increased. Despite of the population growth, the ratio of people living in Manhattan has decreased in compared to other districts of the town.
In the year 1800, 79,216 people resided in New York in which, 76% of the total density (60,515) lived in Manhattan and rest others equivalent to 18,701 belonged to other 4 districts. Similarly, the population tends to multiply by nearly 4 times reaching the number to 3,437,202 in 1900. Still Manhattan was more populated in compared to other regions exceeding with 8%. Furthermore, in the year 2000, the population grew rapidly to 8,009,185 people with less than one fifth of the people living in Manhattan.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main trends in the total population and the shifts in district proportions. However, the analysis is incomplete. You mention the population in 1800, 1900, and 2000, but you fail to report the data for the other districts adequately, focusing almost exclusively on Manhattan. The prompt asks for a summary of all five districts. By omitting specific data points for Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx, and Staten Island, the response lacks the necessary detail to fully satisfy the task requirements. Furthermore, the term 'population density' is used incorrectly; the tables show total population numbers, not density (people per square mile).
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into three paragraphs, which is a logical structure for a report. There is a clear introduction and an overview. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'While the other two tables reports' is grammatically incorrect and creates a fragmented sentence structure. The transition 'Similarly' is used to link the 1800 and 1900 data, but the connection is weak because the growth was not strictly 'similar' in nature. Paragraphing is present, but the flow between sentences could be improved to better guide the reader through the data comparisons.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision. You use 'fluctuations' to describe a steady increase, which is inaccurate; 'fluctuation' implies rising and falling. The phrase 'rest others equivalent to' is clunky and unnatural. You also use 'density' when you mean 'total population,' which is a significant lexical error in an academic context. While you attempt to use some descriptive language, the word choices often do not accurately reflect the statistical data provided in the tables.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
There are several grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Subject-verb agreement is inconsistent, such as 'tables reports' instead of 'tables report'. The phrase 'Despite of the population growth' is incorrect; it should be 'Despite the population growth' or 'In spite of the population growth'. You also have issues with prepositional phrases, such as 'in compared to,' which should be 'compared to' or 'in comparison with.' While you use a mix of simple and complex structures, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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