Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The first table illustrates the changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The other tables depicts the fluctuations in the population of the five districts of the city such as Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island during the same period as the first table.
Overall, New York City combining all the five districts has experienced a tremendous rise in the population. Manhattan district had initially a larger contribution to the overall New York city's population but later it was overtook by the other remaining districts.
New York City had 79,216 people in 1800 which skyrocketed to 3,437,202 in 1900 and reached 8,009,185 people in 2000. Earlier, Manhattan contributed 76% to the city's total population at 60,515 in 1800. Following 1800, in 1900 its contribution decreased to 54% having 1,850,093 people and then dropped to 19% in 2000 having 1,538,096 people.
Contribution from the other districts which included Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island was comparatively low when compared to Manhattan's contribution. In 1800, 24% was the contribution of the other districts to the city's whole population at 18,701. Later, the proportion increased to 46% of the total population having 1,587,109 people. It almost doubled in the year 2000 witnessing 6,471,809 people covering 81% of the total population.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response effectively identifies the main trends in the data, specifically the overall population growth and the shift in demographic distribution from Manhattan to the other districts. You have successfully selected and reported key figures to support your points. However, the task requires reporting on the five districts, and while you grouped them, you missed the opportunity to highlight specific individual district trends (e.g., Brooklyn's significant growth). The overview is clear, but the analysis could be more nuanced by contrasting the specific growth patterns of the individual districts rather than just grouping them into 'Manhattan' versus 'others'.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use cohesive devices such as 'Following 1800' and 'In 1800' to manage the timeline effectively. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing could be smoother. For instance, the phrase 'the other remaining districts' is a bit redundant. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate, and the information is presented in a way that allows the reader to navigate the data without confusion.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the information clearly, using terms like 'skyrocketed', 'fluctuations', and 'contribution'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'the other tables depicts' (should be 'depict') and 'it was overtook' (should be 'overtaken'). While you attempt to use some less common vocabulary, the range is somewhat limited for a higher band. To improve, focus on more precise collocations and ensure subject-verb agreement when using academic terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that slightly distract from the flow, such as 'Manhattan district had initially a larger contribution' (word order) and 'New York City combining all the five districts' (needs a comma or relative clause). Additionally, 'it was overtook' is a tense error. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Increasing the variety of complex structures while ensuring accuracy in verb forms would improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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