Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The first table illustrates variations in the total population of New York City between 1800 from 2000. However, the second tables indicate changes in the population of the five districts of the city.
Overall,
At the beginning of 1800, New York City, including all five districts, had a total population of 79,216, which was the lowest figure recorded. In 1900, the total population increased to 3,437,202 from 79,216 in 1800. However, the total population had reached 8,009,185 by 2000.
Furthermore, Manhattan had a population of 60,515, making up 76% of the total population, which was the highest proportion recorded in 1800. In addition, it had a population to 1,850,093 in 1900, accounting for 54% of total population. However, in 2000 it had a population of 1,538,096 representing 19% total population which was lowest percentage noted.
Other all five districts
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. Furthermore, the response is incomplete; it contains unfinished sentences such as 'Overall,' and 'Other all five districts', and fails to provide any data or analysis for the remaining districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island). While the data provided for Manhattan and the total population is accurate, the failure to complete the summary and the lack of a comprehensive overview of all data points mean the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The essay lacks a logical structure due to the unfinished nature of the writing. The introduction is present, but the body paragraphs are disjointed and incomplete. The use of cohesive devices is limited and mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'In addition' and 'However'. Paragraphing is attempted but remains ineffective because the content within the paragraphs is not fully developed or concluded. The incomplete sentences at the end of the text severely disrupt the flow and coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is adequate for basic description but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. The student uses simple terms like 'variations', 'changes', and 'increased'. There are some inaccuracies in collocation, such as 'population to 1,850,093' instead of 'population of'. The student struggles to express complex ideas about data trends, relying on repetitive phrasing. To improve, the student should incorporate more varied vocabulary related to data trends and proportions.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Examples include 'between 1800 from 2000' (should be 'and'), 'the second tables' (should be 'the second table'), and 'representing 19% total population' (missing 'of the'). While the meaning is generally clear, the errors are frequent enough to be noticeable. The unfinished sentences also contribute to a lack of grammatical control. More attention to prepositions and articles is needed.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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