Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The following figures depicts the trend of increasing population in new York city in overall districts and specificly in Manhattan and brooklyn,bronx, queens or staten island.At a glance it be observed that the overall population in New York sharply increased by 1900,however the trend followed the same increase by 2000.In the contrast the other tables shows the population change in Manhattan and other districts in respect to percentage of the total population.Although the population level increased from 1800 to 2000 in New York city in order to gain the adequate facilities and opportunities here.On the other hand a large proportion of the total population migrated from Manhattan and population level showed a massive decrease in 1900.The level of residency fell further to a small ratio of the total population.Additionally for the other districts same trend as new york city can be seen as people chose to migrate to different districts as per their convenience in search of better opportunities and a better lifestyle.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the data but fails to provide a clear, accurate overview of the main trends. While it mentions the total population increase, it struggles to interpret the specific data points provided in the tables. For instance, the claim that there was a 'massive decrease' in Manhattan in 1900 is not supported by the data provided, which shows a steady increase in absolute numbers. The response lacks specific data points (years or figures) to support the general statements made. To improve, you must select key data points from the tables to illustrate your points rather than relying on vague descriptions.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response lacks clear paragraphing, which makes it difficult to follow the progression of information. While some cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'In the contrast', 'Additionally'), they are often used incorrectly or in a way that does not logically connect the ideas. The referencing is also weak; for example, 'the other tables' is vague. To improve, organize your response into distinct paragraphs: an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and separate paragraphs for specific details. Ensure that each sentence follows logically from the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and contains several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'specificly' instead of 'specifically' and 'new York city' (capitalization errors). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe trends accurately; for example, using 'massive decrease' to describe a trend that is not clearly defined. There is also a lack of precise terminology for describing data, such as 'proportion', 'percentage', or 'fluctuation'. Focus on learning collocations related to data description, such as 'witnessed a significant rise' or 'accounted for a large proportion'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('figures depicts', 'tables shows') and punctuation errors (missing spaces after commas). Sentence structures are often repetitive and lack complexity. The use of articles is inconsistent, and there are several awkward phrasings, such as 'in order to gain the adequate facilities'. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that punctuation is used correctly. Practice using a wider variety of complex sentence structures to improve your range.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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