Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The initial table illustrates the variations in the total population of new york city between 1800 and 2000. The second and third table demonstrates variations in the population of the five areas of the city manhattan, brooklyn, bronx, queens, staten island over the same time period.
Overall, the table indicates an upward trend in the newyork while, in manhattan the table explains a downward trend whereas, in four districts the table illustrates an upward trend from 1800 to 2000.
Obviously, the population in newyork remained rose and in 3 yeras time it was reached to [redacted phone]. Moreover, in manhattan the percentage of population was drooped to 54% in 1900. Then, in 2000 it remained declined and reached to 19% of total population.
Surely, in other four districts the proportion of total population was climbed daramatically and it ranges from 24% to 81%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While you have identified the main trends, the analysis is superficial. You mention the total population and the shift in proportions, but you fail to provide specific data points from the tables to support your claims effectively. For example, you mention the population reached 8,009,185 but do not contextualize this against the 1800 figure. Furthermore, the description of the districts is overly generalized. To improve, ensure you include more specific data comparisons and meet the length requirement to allow for a full development of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inappropriate. Phrases like 'Obviously' and 'Surely' are not suitable for an academic report, as they sound overly subjective rather than analytical. The progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed, particularly in the transition between the general population overview and the specific district data. To improve, use more neutral linking words such as 'In contrast,' 'Furthermore,' or 'Consequently' to connect your sentences and ensure a smoother flow of information throughout the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is limited and contains several errors in word choice and collocation. For instance, you use 'remained rose' and 'remained declined,' which are grammatically incorrect and confusing. The word 'drooped' is also inappropriate for describing statistical trends; 'decreased' or 'fell' would be more accurate. You also struggle with capitalization, failing to capitalize proper nouns like 'New York City' and the names of the districts. To improve, focus on learning standard collocations for describing data, such as 'experienced a decline' or 'showed an upward trend,' and ensure proper noun capitalization.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with verb tenses and forms, such as 'it was reached to' (should be 'it reached') and 'the proportion... was climbed' (should be 'climbed'). The sentence structures are relatively simple, and there is a lack of variety in complex sentence forms. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly regarding the list of districts. To improve, practice using passive voice for data reporting and focus on subject-verb agreement. Reviewing basic sentence construction will help you avoid awkward phrasing and improve the overall accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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