Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The table illustrates the changes in total population of New York City from [redacted phone] and other table shows changes in population of the 5 districts of the city over same period.
Firstly, in 1800 New York City contributed 79,216 population whereas in 1900 it rose to 3,437,202 population. Moreover in 2000, it suddenly increase to 8,009,185 population.
Furthermore, Manhattan population in 1800 was 60515 at 76% of total population while other districts contributed 18701 population at 24% of total population. In addition, in 1900 Manhattan contributed [redacted phone] at 54% of total population while other districts contributed [redacted phone] at 46% of total population respectively. In the year 2000, Manhattan contributed [redacted phone] population at 19% of total population whereas others districts like Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten island contributed [redacted phone] population at 81% of total population respectively.
To conclude, in 2000 New York City contributed highest population among all others district and in 1880 lowest population was observed.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main trends in the total population and the shift in distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you mention the 1800, 1900, and 2000 figures, you fail to highlight the significant growth patterns or the specific turning points for individual districts like Brooklyn or Queens. The conclusion is also problematic; stating that 'in 1880 lowest population was observed' is inaccurate as the data provided starts in 1800, and the conclusion does not effectively synthesize the main features of the data provided in the tables.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In addition', 'Moreover'). The progression of ideas is logical, but the transitions between the total population data and the district-specific data could be smoother. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when discussing the 'other districts' as a group, which makes the comparison slightly confusing for the reader. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring clearer signposting would enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety expected at higher bands. You rely heavily on basic terms like 'contributed' and 'population', which are repeated throughout the text. There is an attempt to use some data-related vocabulary, but it is limited. Phrases like 'suddenly increase' are not ideal for describing statistical trends; 'surged' or 'experienced a sharp rise' would be more appropriate. To improve, focus on using a wider range of synonyms for 'increase', 'decrease', and 'proportion' to avoid repetitive phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. For instance, 'other table shows' should be 'the other table shows', and 'it suddenly increase' should be 'it suddenly increased'. There are also issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent and affect the overall clarity of the report. Increasing the variety of complex structures and proofreading for basic tense and agreement errors would significantly improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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