Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table presents the modification in entire population of New York state from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables illustrates the changes in the population of the five districts of the New York state (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Overall, population in all the five territories of the New York rose significantly. Manhattan population faced a dramatic decline but on the other hand other regions growth accelerated over the same timeframe.
New York state population began with 79,216 in the 1800 and continue rose 8,009,185 in 2000. The Manhattan region experienced a climb which was 76% of total population in 1800 that was all time high from other states of New York. On the other hand, other states recorded a lowest figures 24% in 1800. The Manhattan state's overall population dropped in 1900 with 54% in total and in 2000 recorded a significant decline in entire population which was 19%.
In contrast, the other states in 1900 reached 46% and in 2000 the entire population peaked at 81%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response provides a clear overview of the population trends. You successfully identified the main feature: the overall growth of New York City and the shifting population distribution from Manhattan to the other districts. However, the data reporting is inconsistent. You refer to the districts as 'states' throughout the text, which is factually incorrect and confusing. Additionally, while you mention the 1800 and 2000 figures, the intermediate data (1900) is used to support your points, but the analysis of the specific district growth is somewhat limited. To improve, ensure you accurately label the geographical entities and provide a more balanced comparison of all districts rather than grouping them solely as 'other states'.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'On the other hand', and 'Overall' to signal shifts in the narrative. However, the referencing is sometimes unclear; for example, the term 'other states' is used repeatedly to refer to the four districts, which creates confusion. Paragraphing is present, but the transition between the general population growth and the specific percentage shifts could be smoother. The logical progression is generally clear, but the mechanical nature of some transitions prevents a higher score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'dramatic decline', 'accelerated', and 'peaked'. However, there are significant issues with word choice and collocation. Referring to the five boroughs of New York City as 'states' is a persistent error that impacts the precision of your writing. Additionally, phrases like 'continue rose' and 'recorded a lowest figures' show a lack of control over grammatical collocations. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main message, the repeated misuse of terminology limits the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur frequently, such as 'The first table illustrates' (subject-verb agreement error with 'tables'), 'continue rose' (incorrect verb form), and 'recorded a lowest figures' (article and pluralization error). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are noticeable and occur throughout the text. You should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles when discussing statistical data to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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