Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table depicts the variations in the total population of New York between 1800 and 2000. The second and third tables illustrate the changes in population of five major districts of the town namely, Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island throughout the same timeframe.
Overall, it is evident that the population underwent enormous growth in the number of citizens. In addition to that, the demographics reflected certain fluctuations in terms of percentage.
To be specific, in 1800, the overall population of New York City was registered for 79,216 citizens which increased significantly at 3,437,202 citizens and thus ultimately reached 8,009,185, the highest among all the cities in 2000.
Meanwhile, Manhattan recorded for about 60,515 citizens initially with exactly 76% which rose dramatically to 54%. But after that, the data experienced a steep fall by difference of around 35%.
The remaining districts accounted for 18,701 citizens, showcased the least figure till now. However, the trajectories climbed and reached 1,587,109 then 6,471,089 with the highest percentage of 81%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main trends, but the analysis is significantly hampered by inaccurate reporting of the data. For instance, the claim that Manhattan's population rose to 54% and then experienced a 'steep fall' is not supported by the provided tables, which show a consistent decline in percentage share over the two centuries. Furthermore, the grouping of the remaining four districts into a single figure is confusing and lacks the necessary detail required for a clear summary. While the overall population growth is noted, the failure to accurately interpret the specific data points for each district prevents a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear introduction and overview. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or misused. For example, the phrase 'in addition to that' is slightly informal, and the transition 'But after that' is abrupt and lacks academic tone. The progression of ideas within the body paragraphs is somewhat disjointed, particularly when attempting to compare the different districts. While the structure is present, the flow between sentences could be improved to ensure a smoother reading experience.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors. Phrases such as 'registered for', 'recorded for', and 'showcased the least figure' are unnatural and do not accurately reflect the data. While the student attempts to use some descriptive language like 'trajectories' and 'fluctuations', the lack of precision in reporting the statistics limits the effectiveness of the lexical range. More precise terminology related to data trends would enhance the quality of the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'increased significantly at 3,437,202' (should be 'to'), 'by difference of around 35%' (missing article), and 'the population underwent enormous growth in the number of citizens' (slightly redundant). While the meaning is generally understandable, the control over prepositions and article usage is inconsistent, which prevents the writing from reaching a higher band level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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