Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The given first table illistrates, about proper calculation on population as total in new york at 1800 to 2000. Futhermore the second data is on population distributed among major five districts with percentage holded by them in each years.
Overview, it can be see that manhatten have huge number of population in perviouse years but after getting to the end its declinted. where on other hand another left over districts showed opposite trend in figure in which, they increased in population rate while, the passing of time tell end.
The filting glances in data, there is the high growth in population as at 1800 their is only 79216 peoples but at the finishing of 2000 its reached to 8,009,185 that is around hundread times growth. Moreover in 1800 the manhattan holdes 76 percent of total communits in nation, but the coming of 2000 it is left with only 19 percentage as showed surge fall.
At the other four places in new york, which is around 1800 to 2000, they illustrate the suden rosed in every after 100 years as at middle of 19's it haved 1,587,109 amount of people with 46% of whole, and after the reaching of 20's it estimated more then the half of all nation.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the task by reporting the main features of the population changes in New York City and its districts between 1800 and 2000. An overview is attempted, noting the contrast between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the response contains several inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data. For instance, the student states that Manhattan's population 'declinted' over the entire period, whereas the table shows it increased significantly from 1800 to 1900 before falling back by 2000. Additionally, the phrase 'around hundread times growth' is a vast overstatement of the total population growth. While the main trends are touched upon, the lack of precision and inaccurate data reporting limit the task response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which provides a basic structural framework, but the logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and poor cohesion. Phrases such as 'The filting glances in data' and 'At the other four places in new york' are unnatural and impede the flow of ideas. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal coherence within paragraphs is weak due to disjointed sentence structures and unclear referencing (e.g., 'after the reaching of 20's it estimated more then the half of all nation'). Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, resulting in a text that lacks a smooth, clear progression.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The lexical range is extremely limited and heavily impacted by spelling and word-choice errors. Words are frequently misspelled or malformed, such as 'illistrates', 'perviouse', 'declinted', 'hundread', 'communits', 'sulden', and 'rosed'. The student attempts some topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'population', 'percentage', 'growth'), but inaccuracies in collocation and word formation—such as 'percentage holded' and 'surge fall'—prevent the vocabulary from being used effectively or precisely. These frequent errors cause strain for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences frequently fail due to severe structural errors. There are constant issues with tense usage, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions (e.g., 'at 1800 to 2000', 'manhatten have huge number', 'their is only 79216 peoples'). Punctuation is also problematic, with incorrect capitalization and comma splices. Because errors are present in almost every sentence and frequently impede comprehension, the grammar falls into the lower band categories.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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