Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The table illustrate exchange of the overall population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. However, the second and third tales compares the population changes in five different cities over the same period.
Overall, New York City total population indicadets highest in 2000, whereas lowest population in 1800. proportion of individuals in Manhattan city over the period, while other four districts consider lower than Manhattan city.
Looking first at, New York City population with all five districts had 8,009,185 in 2000, whereas 79216 in 1800. Manhattan city always on peak moment over the period. In 1800 it showed 76% population and in 2000 declained by 58% and reached at 19%.
By constrate, other four discricts proportion was 25% in 1800 with lowest population, by the year of 1900 it was rose 22% and in 2000 reached at 81% community with highest position in all other four districts.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count of 150 words, coming in slightly short at 148 words, which impacts the overall Task Achievement score. While the student attempts to summarise the data by mentioning the overall population growth and comparing Manhattan to the other districts, the execution is hampered by inaccurate data reporting and underdeveloped overviews. For instance, the student states that Manhattan declined by 58% in population, whereas the data shows a percentage share decrease from 76% to 19% (an absolute population increase from 1800 to 1900, followed by a minor drop to 2000). Furthermore, key figures are misreported or omitted, and the summary lacks a fully cohesive overview of the main trends across the two-century span.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay attempts a standard four-paragraph structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward phrasing and abrupt transitions. For example, expressions like 'Looking first at,' and 'By constrate,' are mechanically deployed and contain spelling or grammatical errors that obscure the flow of ideas. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within sentences is weak, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between Manhattan and the other districts smoothly. Pronoun referencing and linking words require more careful control to achieve a higher band.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple terms such as 'highest', 'lowest', 'population', and 'city'. There are several word-choice errors and inaccurate collocations throughout the text, including 'exchange of the overall population' instead of 'changes in the total population', 'indicadets highest' (misspelled and grammatically incorrect), and 'declained' (declined). Furthermore, statistical terminology is misused when discussing percentages and proportions. The range is limited and minimally adequate for conveying basic facts, but frequent lexical errors restrict the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The text contains a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences with frequent structural errors. There are numerous basic grammatical and punctuation inaccuracies throughout the response, such as 'The table illustrate' (subject-verb agreement error), 'second and third tales compares' (plural/singular mismatch and spelling error), and missing articles or prepositions in phrases like 'proportion of individuals in Manhattan city over the period'. Complex sentences are attempted (e.g., using 'whereas'), but they are often grammatically incomplete or faulty. Errors are frequent and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.