Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The table illustrestes modification in the total population of new york city over a period of time from 1800 to 2000.While others two tables compares the change in the citizens of the five districts of the city.
Overall, it can be clearly seen that in new york city population significantly increased over a period of time. Whereas, subsequntly manharran public ratio had fell down. Moreover, Other districts population was rapidly rose over a period of time.
In New York, the beggining of year the 79,216 population accounted for 1800. Followed by 3,437,202 population in 1900. Then, rapidly grow in 8,009,185 people in 2000.
In manhattan,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 150 words, stopping abruptly at only 105 words and leaving the final section incomplete ('In manhattan,'). Consequently, the second and third tables are not fully addressed, and key comparisons between Manhattan and the other districts over the 200-year period are missing. While an overview is attempted, the severe under-length and incomplete data reporting prevent the response from achieving a satisfactory score in this category.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The text attempts a logical structure by starting with an introduction and an overall trend summary before moving into specific data points. However, the paragraphs are extremely short and disjointed, and the response breaks off mid-sentence. Cohesive devices are basic and sometimes misused (e.g., 'Whereas, subsequntly manharran public ratio had fell down'). Paragraphing is poorly controlled due to the unfinished nature of the text.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and limited, with several spelling errors ('illustrestes', 'subsequntly', 'manharran', 'beggining'). There are also awkward word choices and collocations, such as 'public ratio' instead of 'proportion of the population' and 'rapidly grow in' instead of 'rapidly grew to'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to discuss statistical data precisely.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at more complex constructions are marred by severe errors, such as 'While others two tables compares' and 'Other districts population was rapidly rose'. Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic, notably with proper nouns like 'new york city' and 'manhattan'. Errors frequently impede smooth reading.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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