Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

so here we have the infomation about the population of the new york city's five diffent city. also we have the infomation about in which year the population became blast like incress so fast so in a year of 1800 the total popuplation is 79,216 of five districts of of the city Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island, so from the total population 76% of populationa is shared by the manhattn alone which is so much high number and rest of 24% is from rest of 4 districts. and then year changes the story will also changes the number will changes so much then the last year the total population will came in total number at 3,437,202 which is so much high then the year 1800 it like so much and also same as last year the Manhattan shared the 54% of the total population and the rest 46% by the four citys and which is also incressed then the last year but still not matched the number with the Manhattn.

now the year is chganed and the numbers are also changed and this time the story of number is differnent then past two years. the data is totlay chaned then the 1900 and 1800 now 81% of populationa shared by the four districts which is very high in number then the Manhatten and there onwn two years data the number goes higher the the entery data.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the task by reporting some figures from the tables, such as the total population in 1800 (79,216) and the percentages for Manhattan and the other districts. However, the information is only partially addressed, and the overall picture is underdeveloped. Much of the writing relies on vague, conversational narration like 'the story will also changes' rather than a clear selection of main trends. Furthermore, key comparisons over the 200-year span are not presented in a structured academic manner, leaving the response feeling disjointed and incomplete regarding overall population growth across all five districts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The text lacks a clear overall progression. Ideas are strung together in a continuous, run-on style using basic, repetitive conjunctions and spoken filler phrases such as 'so here we have' and 'now the year is chganed'. Paragraphing is extremely poor, as the response is divided into only two massive, block-like paragraphs that do not separate introduction, main trends, or distinct time periods logically. Cohesive devices are minimal, inadequate, and often inaccurate, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logical development of the data.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Vocabulary use is very limited and basic, featuring frequent repetition of everyday words like 'things', 'numbers', and 'story'. There are also several noticeable spelling mistakes and inappropriate word choices, such as 'infomation', 'diffent', 'popuplation', 'incress', and 'totlay chaned'. While the student attempts to use some basic statistical terms like 'percentage' and 'population', the overall lexical range is minimally adequate at best, and errors occasionally cause strain and confusion for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response shows a very limited range of sentence structures, relying almost entirely on simple sentences joined haphazardly by commas and conjunctions. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout, including incorrect verb tenses ('the total population will came'), missing articles, subject-verb agreement issues ('the populationa is shared'), and flawed clause structures. These persistent errors create frequent difficulty for the reader and prevent the formation of reliable complex sentences.

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