Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The tables illustrates the proportion of population growth in five districts of the New York city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) respevtively, from 1800 to 2000.
Overall,the population of New York city increase significantly through thr two centuries.In the first ten dcades the more the 50% contribution in population from Manhattan district and the remain proportion is fron other four districs. Meanwhile, the noteable point is for the following ten decades the Manhattan shares went to the quater of the all other four district (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island).
Looking into more details, in 1800 the their was 76% populatio belong to Manhattan by 60515 individuals and the almost remaining quater of population from other four districs. In the same in 1900 the share of Manhattan decease from 22 percentage piont by 54%, on the other hand the there was 46% contribution of other remaining districs.
Regarding the last ten decades in 2000 there popolation of Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island surepass the Manhattan by the percentage of 81%. The notable point is the in the last ten decades Manhattan population decrease by almost 0.3 million individuals.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons between New York City's total population and its constituent districts from 1800 to 2000. An overview is provided at the beginning, noting the significant overall growth. However, some parts of the response are under-developed or unclear, particularly in the second and third body paragraphs where the expression of data is muddled. For instance, phrases such as 'the Manhattan shares went to the quater of the all other four district' and the confusing reference to 'decease from 22 percentage piont' reflect limitations in fully developing and clarifying key comparative details. Nevertheless, the main trends—such as Manhattan's early dominance and subsequent decline in percentage terms alongside the surge in the other four districts—are correctly identified and supported with figures from the tables.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The text exhibits a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introductory paragraph, an overview, and subsequent body paragraphs examining specific time periods. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, overview, and detailed body sections. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical, and referencing is not always clear. For instance, transitional phrases feel abrupt, and sentences like 'Meanwhile, the noteable point is for the following ten decades...' create a disjointed flow. Pronoun referencing and substitution are occasionally confusing, requiring the reader to work harder to follow the logical progression between sentences. While the overarching structure is logical, the execution of cohesive devices and cohesive ties needs greater flexibility and accuracy to achieve a higher standard.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to population growth, percentages, and geographical districts such as 'proportion', 'districts', and 'individuals'. However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'illustrates' paired with a plural subject ('tables illustrates'), spelling mistakes like 'respevtively', 'thr', 'dcades', 'noteable', 'quater', 'decease', and 'surepass', and awkward lexical collocations such as 'percentage piont'. The writer attempts less common vocabulary, but these attempts are frequently marred by inaccuracies, restricting the lexical score to this level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to use varied structures such as relative clauses and comparative constructions. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text that cause some difficulty for the reader. Issues include subject-verb agreement errors ('tables illustrates', 'popolation ... surepass'), missing articles ('in 1800 the their was 76% populatio belong to Manhattan'), incorrect prepositions ('from other four districs'), and awkward tense shifts ('in 2000 there popolation ... surepass'). Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after commas and periods. These recurrent grammatical inaccuracies mean that while communication is generally maintained, control over complex structures remains inconsistent.
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