Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table illustrates the total amount of population changes in the New York city over a period of 200 years. Overall, the population raised significantly from thousands to lacs between [redacted phone]. The second and third table compares the changes in the number of residents in the five disctricts of New York city, where the population of Manhattan dristrict fallen drastically from [redacted phone]. While, in the other four regions, the number of people increased gradually over time.
On the one hand, looking into the detailed information, it is evident that the in the 1800s, there were only 79,216 people in the New York city. With the passage of time, this number elevated to 3,437,202 in the 1900s, and eventually reaching at its peak in 2000, with almost 8,009,185 pupils.
On the other hand, one of the districts of the New York city, Manhattan, alone consisted 76% pf the total population in the 1800. While, the other districts contributed the remaining 24%. In contrast, in the 1900s, this fraction increased gradually reaching 46% in these four districts, whereas Manhattan showed a reduction in the number of people to almost 54%. However, in 2000, all the 4 districts showed an elevation in their population peaking at 81%, while Manhattan showed reduction to 19% respectively.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features of the overall population and the changes across the districts of New York City. An overview is present at the beginning, noting the significant growth and the contrasting trajectories between Manhattan and the other regions. However, some areas are developed less fully than others. For instance, the data is sometimes described with broad generalizations rather than precise reporting of key figures, such as referring to 'lacs' instead of precise scale or misinterpreting the percentage shifts slightly. To reach a higher band, the response needs to present a more fully developed selection of data points, ensuring that all comparisons between districts are accurately drawn and clearly highlighted throughout.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response maintains a coherent overall arrangement and presents a logical progression through a clear introduction and subsequent body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used to separate the overall trends and the regional breakdown. However, cohesion relies on somewhat mechanical and repetitive linking phrases, such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand', which are used inappropriately here since the data sets are not two sides of a single argument. Additionally, referencing is occasionally imprecise. To improve Coherence and Cohesion, the writer should use a wider and more natural variety of cohesive devices and ensure that transitional phrases accurately reflect the relationship between the data points.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate basic trends such as 'elevated', 'increased gradually', and 'reduction'. However, there are notable lexical shortcomings, including word-choice and translation errors like 'total amount of population changes' instead of 'total population changes', the use of 'lacs' (an Indian English term inappropriate for standard academic IELTS), and spelling or word form errors such as 'disctricts' and 'pupils' to refer to adult residents. Less common vocabulary is attempted with some inaccuracy. To achieve a higher band, the writer must expand their range of functional academic vocabulary and eliminate inappropriate regional terms or incorrect collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like relative clauses and time-clause modifiers. There are some grammatical and punctuation errors present, such as unnecessary commas ('that the in the 1800s'), missing articles ('in the New York city'), preposition errors ('reaching at its peak'), and faulty verb patterns ('alone consisted 76% pf'). Nevertheless, these errors rarely impede overall communication, and the meaning remains clear. To move up to a higher band, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences and exercise tighter control over articles, prepositions, and verb complements.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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