Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The first table illustrates the changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. While the second and third tables indicate the changes in the population of the five districts of the City ( Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

It is evident from the illustration that in 2000, New York City, where the largest proportion of the total population stood at 8,009,185. The second largest proportion in 1900, had the total population of the New York City at 3,437,202. while the lowest proportion in 1800, at 79,216. Whereas Manhattan in 2000, the largest proportion of the total population of Manhattan was at 1,538,096, it accounted for 19% of the total population but percentage was lowest; this was followed by 1900, population at 1,850,093 made up 54% it increased from 2000, the lowest proportion represented at 76% of total population at 60,515 in 1800.

Turning to other districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) in

2000, the largest proportion of the population at 6,471,089 accounted for 81% of total population. Followed by 1900, ranked second in population at 1,587,109 which made up 46% of total population, while the lowest proportion represented 24% with a population of 18,701 in 1800.

Overall, the largest proportion was recorded in 2000 in New York City, Manhattan and Other districts except Manhattan while 1900 was stable and the lowest proportion was in 1800 except Manhattan.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response makes an attempt to address the task by reporting some figures from the tables, but it suffers from significant limitations. The description of the data is often confused and lacks a clear overview of the main trends. For instance, the opening paragraph relies on a sentence fragment ('While the second and third tables indicate...'), and the student misinterprets the relationship between the numbers by referring to population totals as 'proportions' or conflating population counts with percentages. While some key figures from 1800, 1900, and 2000 are mentioned, the details are under-developed and difficult to follow due to poor selection and reporting of the main features. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to present a clearer, more accurate summary of the overall trends, such as the dramatic population growth across all districts over the two-century period, and avoid confusing absolute figures with percentage shares.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response shows some basic paragraphing, separating the introduction, Manhattan, the other districts, and a concluding attempt. However, there is a distinct lack of clear overall progression, making the text hard to navigate. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, such as starting sentences with 'While', 'Whereas', or 'Followed by 1900, ranked second', which creates fragmented and confusing links between ideas. Referencing is also weak, as pronouns and transitional phrases do not clearly connect back to the intended data points. To improve Coherence and Cohesion, the writer must ensure that sentences flow logically from one to the next, using appropriate cohesive markers naturally rather than mechanically, and maintain a clear, structured progression for each data category.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The student successfully employs basic terms related to data presentation, such as 'table', 'population', 'percentage', and 'total', but struggles with precise word choice and collocation. For example, using 'proportion' to describe absolute population figures like 8,009,185 is inaccurate. There are also awkward phrasings and lexical repetitions throughout the text. While spelling is generally acceptable, the restricted range of vocabulary and frequent lexical inaccuracies cause some difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher score, the student should incorporate a wider range of precise vocabulary appropriate for academic writing, such as verbs of change (e.g., 'surge', 'peak', 'decline') and accurate terminology to distinguish between absolute numbers and relative proportions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response demonstrates a very limited range of sentence structures, relying heavily on simple or faultily constructed complex sentences. There are frequent grammatical errors, including sentence fragments ('While the second and third tables indicate...'), missing auxiliary verbs, awkward preposition use ('population at 6,471,089'), and incorrect clause structures. For example, the sentence beginning 'Whereas Manhattan in 2000...' is heavily convoluted and grammatically broken, mixing percentages, years, and population counts without a clear main clause. These frequent errors cause considerable strain and difficulty for the reader. To improve in this area, the writer must focus on constructing complete, grammatically sound sentences, ensuring proper subject-verb agreement, and avoiding overly complex, tangled clauses that obscure the intended meaning.

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