Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The tables compare changes in the amount of population in New York city over a period of 200 years from 1800 to 2000.
Overall, the population of New York city increased dramatically between [redacted phone]. The Manhattan district showed a substantial reduction in the number of residents. On the contrary, the population inclined gradually in the other four disctricts; Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island, occupying the majority of the whole population of New York city.
On the one hand, it can be seen that the New York city consisted 79,216 pupils in 1800. However, this number rose substantially, reaching 3,437,202 in 1900. In contrast, the population almost doubled peaking at 8009,185 in 2000.
On the other hand, one of the districts of New York city, Manhattan contributed highest number of residents, approximately 60,515, almost 76% of the total population of New York in 1800. But, in 1900, there was a dramatic fall in this fraction from 76% to 54%, consisting 1,850,093 pupils. Furthermore, this fraction continue to decrease, reaching 1,538,096, approximately 19%.
In addition, the other four districts showed variation in their population. In 1800, there were only 18,701 residents in the four districts. However, this number increased gradually to 1587,109 , constituting 46% of total pupils in 1900. Finally, these 4 disctricts accounted majority of the population of New york city in 2000, peaking at 81% with 6,471,089 residents.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5
The response successfully covers all parts of the task by selecting and reporting the main features of the population changes in New York City and its districts over the 200-year span. An overview is provided, highlighting the overall dramatic population increase, the decline in Manhattan's share, and the contrasting growth in the other districts. However, some areas of the response are slightly under-developed or less precise. For instance, the student mislabels the population data as 'pupils' instead of residents or people throughout the text. Additionally, the description of population trends could have benefited from a more precise breakdown of the intermediate period in 1900. While the main features are clearly identified and supported by data, the minor inaccuracies in terminology and occasional lack of complete expansion prevent it from reaching the next level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay presents a clear overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas from the total population figures to specific district comparisons. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different aspects of the visual data, such as the general trend, Manhattan's trajectory, and the combined other districts. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the contrary', and 'In addition'. However, the use of these cohesive links is sometimes mechanical or slightly faulty, such as using 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' when contrasting the total population growth against district breakdowns rather than balancing two opposing arguments. Furthermore, referencing is generally clear, though minor disjointedness in transitions keeps the response at this level.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'substantial reduction', 'inclined gradually', and 'constituting'. However, there are noticeable word-choice and word-form errors that prevent a higher score. Most prominently, the repeated use of the word 'pupils' to refer to the general population is a significant lexical error. Other minor slips include spelling errors like 'disctricts' and awkward phrasing such as 'contributed highest number of residents'. While these errors do not seriously impede communication, they reflect a limited control over precise word choice and collocation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and introductory prepositional phrases effectively, such as 'over a period of 200 years from 1800 to 2000' and 'reaching 3,437,202 in 1900'. There are some grammatical errors in the text, such as missing articles ('the New York city consisted', 'accounted majority'), incorrect prepositions, and verb tense inconsistencies (e.g., 'this fraction continue to decrease' instead of 'continued'). Nonetheless, these errors are relatively infrequent and do not impede the overall communication of the data, allowing the sentence structures to remain generally clear and understandable.
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