Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The initial table illustrate modification in the overall residents of New York City between 1800 and 2000. The next tables demonstrate improvements in the inhabitants of the divisions of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same duration.
Overall, the highest number of population accounted in New York City and lowest figure of inhabitants noted in other districts.
In details, Number of inhabitants were 79,216 in 1800 which were increased to 3,437,202 in 1900 while in 2000 population significantly rose up to 8,009,185 respectively. In addition, in 1800 number of inhabitants noted 60,515 which were 76% of total population and the citizens increased 1,850,093 while ratio decreased to 54%. Furthermore, number of inhabitants rose up to 1,538,096 however ratio decreased to 19%. Moreover, the other districts population calculated 18,701 which was 24% of total population while in 1900 number of inhabitants and overall proportion both increased to 1,587,109 and 46%. Finally, number of citizens and ratio increased to 6,471,089 and 81%. Beside, ratio of Manhattan declined gradually from 76% to 19% between the year 1800 and 2000 however other districts proportion grew up from 24% to 81% from the year 1800 to 2000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response partially addresses the task by reporting several key figures from the tables, such as the total population figures for New York City in 1800, 1900, and 2000, and mentioning the distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the overview is confused and inaccurate, stating that the lowest figure of inhabitants was noted in other districts when the data shows they eventually grew to hold the vast majority of the population by 2000. Additionally, the body paragraphs present a dense, list-like sequence of figures without a clear analytical structure or sufficient comparison between the districts throughout the period. To reach a higher level, the response needs a clearer, more accurate overview and a more selective, well-structured comparison of the main trends rather than attempting to report every single data point.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
There is some basic organisation with an introduction, a body section, and a concluding synthesis of the percentage shifts, but the overall progression of information lacks clarity. Cohesive devices are used repetitively and sometimes inaccurately, such as starting consecutive sentences with 'In addition', 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'Finally'. Paragraphing is also poorly managed, as the main body is compressed into a single, wall-like paragraph containing multiple distinct ideas and time periods, making the text difficult to follow. Referencing between sentences is sometimes mechanical. To improve, the writer should use paragraphing more effectively by grouping related data—such as one paragraph for overall growth and another for district comparisons—and vary cohesive links more naturally.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is rather limited and basic, with frequent inaccuracies in word choice, word form, and collocation. Examples include 'illustrate modification' instead of 'illustrates changes', 'highest number of population accounted' instead of 'highest population was recorded', and 'In details' instead of 'In detail'. There are also awkward phrasings such as 'rose up' and 'population calculated'. These lexical limitations and errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. To achieve a higher score, the student should incorporate a wider range of precise vocabulary suitable for data reporting, such as verbs like 'surged', 'plummeted', or 'accounted for', and ensure correct word forms and collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response shows a very limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at more complex or multi-clause sentences frequently result in grammatical errors. There are frequent mistakes in subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'The initial table illustrate' instead of 'illustrates', 'Number of inhabitants were' instead of 'was', and missing articles before nouns ('ratio decreased'). Prepositional usage and relative clause structures are also flawed, such as 'population accounted in New York City'. These frequent errors can cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer needs to demonstrate better control over basic grammatical agreements, tense consistency when describing historical data, and construct complex sentences with greater accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.