Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table gives the information of changes happened in the total population of New York City, While the second and third tables illustrates the changes of all five districts of New York City (Manhatten, Broklym, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) in 1800, 1900 and 2000.
Overall, the population of all five districts of the city increased significantly in the period, Manhatten population reached a peak at 1800 after declined at 2000, other districts of the city also saw a exceptional increase in increase in population.
Initially, all five districts population increased significantly from 79,216 in 1800 to 3,47,202 in 1900, and it reached peak at 8,009,185 in the year 2000. Specifically, Manhatten saw a huge proportion of 76 % in the year 1800 in number 60,515 after that there population decreased to 54% in the year 1900 to 1,850,093. Finally, after an century there population is seen continously decreasing as it reaches to 19% 1,538,098 in the year 2000.
In terms of other districts, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island collectively their population increased significantly from 24% proportion in the year 1800 in numbers 18,701 to 1,587,109 percentage of 46% in the year 1900. While it reached peak in the century later in 2000, it is now at 6,471,089, 81% in percentage.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by summarizing the data for the total population and the five districts across the three designated years. An overview is provided, and key features such as the dominance of Manhattan in 1800 followed by its relative decline, alongside the rapid growth of the other districts, are reported. However, some ideas are under-developed or imprecise. For instance, the statement that Manhattan 'reached a peak at 1800' is factually incorrect according to the data, as Manhattan's population actually peaked in 1900 at 1,850,093. Furthermore, the selection of data includes some minor inaccuracies, such as transcribing the 1900 total population as '3,47,202' instead of 3,437,202. To achieve a higher band, the response would need to ensure greater accuracy in interpreting the trends and fully develop comparisons between Manhattan and the other districts with precise data points.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response displays a coherent overall arrangement, with a clear four-paragraph structure comprising an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs detailing the specific data. Information and ideas are generally organized in a logical sequence, moving from general totals to district-specific breakdowns. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. The use of comma splices and run-on sentences, such as 'Specifically, Manhatten saw a huge proportion of 76 % in the year 1800 in number 60,515 after that there population decreased...', weakens the flow of ideas. Additionally, referencing is occasionally unclear, and transitional phrases are sometimes overused or awkwardly applied. To progress to a higher band, the writer should employ a wider range of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that sentences are linked with precise logical transitions rather than relying on weak punctuation or repetitive connectors.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to discuss statistical data with terms such as 'proportion', 'population', and 'increased significantly'. However, the range is limited, and there are noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form that occasionally impede communication. For instance, the names of the districts contain spelling errors ('Manhatten', 'Broklym'), and phrases like 'in number 60,515' or 'in numbers 18,701' are unnatural collocations. The writer also misuses words, as seen in 'an exceptional increase in increase in population' and the confusion between 'their population' and 'there population'. To reach a higher band, the student needs to expand their lexical repertoire, incorporate less common vocabulary with greater precision, and eliminate spelling and word-choice errors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like relative clauses and comparative statements. However, control over grammar and punctuation is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and prepositions within grammatical patterns, such as 'changes happened in', 'population increased... and it reached peak', and 'after an century'. Punctuation is also problematic, marked by frequent comma splices linking independent clauses without proper coordination. These errors demonstrate the characteristics of a response where attempts at complex structures are often faulty. To achieve a higher band, the writer must improve the accuracy of complex sentence formations, ensure correct article and preposition usage, and master sentence boundaries to minimize grammatical errors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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