Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Two tables are given to show the comparison of population from 1800 to 2000 of New York city. The first one illustrates the overall population of New York city while the other describes how all five districts(Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island) of the city are populated individually.

Overall, a significant increase in population can be seen throughout the period. while, breaking them down, it can be visibly seen that Manhattan district grew most as compared to others.

To begin with, New York's population was 79216 in year 1800 and it rose dramatically and became [redacted phone] in 1900, whereas, it was [redacted phone] in year 2000 by amlost growing more than double of that in the year1800.

Moreover, Manhattan held 76% of the population in contrast to other districts holding 24% in the year 1800. Furthermore, in year 1900 other districts increased by 46% and making it to [redacted phone] in numbers, while Manhattan had 54% increase. Last but not the least, other disctricts had a substantial rise by achieving 81% of the overall population of the city in the yaer 2000 and leaving only 19% to Manhattan district.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features of the overall population growth and the changes in the five districts. However, some ideas are under-developed or inaccurately supported. For instance, the overview incorrectly states that Manhattan grew the most compared to others, whereas the data shows that the other districts experienced a much larger population surge. While data is included, minor errors in data reporting occur, such as writing '15871009' instead of '1,587,109'. To reach a higher level, the overview needs to accurately reflect the main trends shown in the charts, and the key comparisons between Manhattan and the other districts should be presented with greater precision and full development.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, moving from an introduction to an overview and then into detailed body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore'. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or slightly faulty, and referencing is not always completely clear. For example, the transition at the beginning of the second paragraph 'while, breaking them down' uses lowercase and awkward punctuation. To improve, the logical connection between sentences needs to feel more natural, and cohesive devices should be employed with greater flexibility rather than relying on formulaic linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common vocabulary such as 'dramatically', 'substantial', and 'proportion'. However, there are noticeable word-choice errors, spelling issues, and typos that detract from precision, such as 'amlost' instead of 'almost' and 'disctricts' instead of 'districts'. Furthermore, the phrasing 'other districts increased by 46%' misinterprets the percentage share data from the table. To achieve a higher score, the vocabulary must be used with greater accuracy and appropriateness regarding statistical terms, and spelling errors should be eliminated.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an ability to construct compound and complex sentences like 'while the other describes how all five districts... are populated individually'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as incorrect comma splices and capitalization issues at the start of sentences and clauses, for instance starting a sentence with 'while, breaking them down'. Preposition use also falters occasionally, as seen in 'in year 1800' missing the article 'the'. These errors rarely impede communication, but to move up, the response needs a higher proportion of error-free complex structures and better control over punctuation.

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