Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The first table illustrates modification in the overall population of New york City from 1800 yo 2000, along with the variation in the overall population of the five area of the urban area: Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island during the same timeframe.
Overall, it is clear that the overall population of rose higly over the New York City, especially the main areas of whole city jumped their population very fastly.
In 1800, the total population was 79,216 then it jumped into 3,437,202 in 1900 and in 2000, it reached at 8,009,185 with . Firstly, Manhattan had total population of 60,515 started with 76% in 1800 and reached at 54%. In 1900, it jumped on 1,850,093 and reached at 54% in 2000, it declined upto 1,538,096 with 19%.
Other districts highly increased their population, In 1800, the total population was 18,701 with 24% and in 1900, it jumped upto 1,587,109 with 46%. Furthermore, in 2000, it reach at peak with 81% and at this time , the total population was 6,471,089.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main figures and making relevant comparisons between Manhattan and the other districts from 1800 to 2000. For instance, you correctly noted the overall population jump from 79,216 to 8,009,185 and contrasted Manhattan's declining percentage share against the rising figures for the other districts. However, some ideas and details are under-developed or unclear, such as the incomplete sentence trailing off with 'with .' and slight confusion regarding percentages in the Manhattan paragraph. To reach a higher level, ensure all data points are reported with complete clarity and fully supported without trailing phrases.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to group information logically by paragraphs, moving from an introduction to general trends, then Manhattan, and finally the other districts. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty and mechanical, with repetitive phrasing such as 'total population was' and awkward transitional links like 'Firstly,' followed by tangled sentence structures. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, making the progression between ideas feel jerky rather than fluid. To improve, work on using a wider and more natural variety of cohesive devices to connect your sentences and paragraphs smoothly.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate basic trends using words like 'modification', 'variation', 'declined', and 'peak'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'rose higly' instead of 'rose steeply', 'jumped their population very fastly', and using 'modification' where 'changes' or 'growth' would be more natural. There are also occasional typos like 'yo' instead of 'to'. To achieve a higher score, you should incorporate less common lexical items accurately and pay closer attention to natural word partnerships.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like time clauses and relative comparisons ('In 1800, the total population was...'). However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the overall population of rose'), missing prepositions, and awkward phrasing such as 'it reach at peak'. Punctuation is also faulty in places, such as the dangling sentence ending with 'with .' and unnecessary commas. To improve this criterion, focus on ensuring tighter control over basic grammatical structures and reducing errors in verb forms and prepositions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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