Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Here we discuss about the total population of New York city from year 1800 to 2000.Here in the example table we see the population in year 1800 is 79,219.In year 1900 the population is 3,437,202. and also the population in year 2000 os 8,009,185. if we comparision here then we find more like number of population increases not decrease till year 2000.
Now we discuss about the population of five district of city(New York).
Mahattan district the number of population in year 1800 is 60,515 and ghe total percentage is 76%.
In 1900 the population is 1,850,093.After few years like in 2000 the popukation inthis district is about1,538,096. and the population according to percentage is 19%.
Now,We discuss about other district like Brooklyn,Bronx,Queens,and Staten Island.
Number of population in 1800 in these areas is 18,701.As percentage total population is 24%. In 1900 total population is 1,587,019. As percentage of total population is 46%.At the end the population in year 2000 is 6,471,089.As percentage of population is 81%.Its increases with the time.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the task partially by attempting to summarise the main features and trends in the tables. It correctly identifies the overall population growth from 1800 to 2000 and notes the shifts in population distribution between Manhattan and the other districts. However, the data presentation lacks precision and organisation, with some numbers slightly misstated, such as 79,219 instead of 79,216, and 1,587,019 instead of 1,587,109. Furthermore, the selection of data is somewhat mechanical, relying heavily on listing figures sequentially rather than integrating them into a cohesive analytical summary. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to select and compare key trends more effectively rather than simply transposing raw data row by row, ensuring a clearer overview of how the population patterns evolved.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
There is some organisation in the response, dividing the overview into the total population and specific districts, but it lacks a clear overall progression. The use of cohesive devices is repetitive and overly reliant on conversational meta-language, such as 'Here we discuss about', 'Now we discuss about', and 'At the end'. Paragraphing is fragmented and fails to structure the writing logically, as single sentences often form isolated paragraphs. To improve, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive links to connect sentences smoothly and group related information into unified, coherent paragraphs that present a logical flow of ideas without relying on formulaic transitions.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, which restricts the quality of the response. Words like 'population', 'district', and 'percentage' are repeated frequently due to a lack of synonyms and paraphrasing skills. There are also several noticeable lexical errors, including spelling mistakes like 'Mahattan' instead of 'Manhattan' and 'popukation' instead of 'population', as well as word-form issues such as 'comparision' instead of 'comparison' or 'compare'. These errors and the restricted range of vocabulary cause some difficulty for the reader and keep the writing at a basic level. To progress, the student must expand their vocabulary range by incorporating synonyms and less common items, while paying closer attention to accurate spelling and word formation.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The writer demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures, relying primarily on simple sentences and basic present tense forms, even when discussing historical data from 1800. Attempts at complex sentences are absent or faulty, and there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Issues include incorrect prepositions and verb patterns, such as 'Here we discuss about', missing articles like 'in year 1800', subject-verb agreement issues like 'number of population increases', and persistent punctuation errors such as missing spaces after periods. These frequent errors cause strain for the reader. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to use a greater variety of complex grammatical structures accurately and maintain better control over basic sentence mechanics, tense consistency, and punctuation.
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