Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The total population in the cities provided on the charts shown manhattan seems to have a high population percentage of 76% starting from the year 1800 then went down in the year of 1900 which is 54% percent and it kept declining til the year 2000
Other districts like brooklyn, bronx, queens, staten island, the population percentage shown in the chart shows that from the year 1800 it wasnt very high to begin with it had a percentage of 24% then got higher by the year of 1900 by +22% which is 46% and by the year 2000 unlike manhatten the population rate was getting higher every hundred years 1800 was 24% then the year 1900 upped by 22% then the year 2000 upped by 31%
So each district had a diffrent percantage but manhatten started off really strong then the percentage got lower every 100 years however the other districts started off with a low percantage thrn got higher every 100 years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the task only partially. While the student attempts to highlight features of the population changes in Manhattan and the other districts, the overall overview is lacking, and the data is presented with limited development. Specifically, the student mentions overall population percentages and trends like Manhattan's decline and the other districts' growth, but omits key overall figures from the first table such as the total population growth of New York City from 79,216 in 1800 to over 8 million in 2000. Furthermore, the writing tends to drift into repetitive statements, such as recounting the exact percentage increases multiple times for the other districts, which restricts the depth of coverage.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
There is some basic organisation into paragraphs, but the text lacks a clear overall progression. The response reads more like a continuous stream of thought rather than a well-structured academic essay. Cohesive devices are inadequate and repetitive, heavily relying on basic sequential transitions like 'then' and 'by the year'. Paragraphing is attempted to separate Manhattan from the other districts and provide a summary, but referencing and logical links between sentences are frequently faulty, making the flow disjointed and mechanical for the reader.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The student relies on basic, repetitive terms such as 'population percentage', 'district', 'higher', and 'lower'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'upped by 22%' instead of increasing by 22 percentage points, and misspellings like 'manhatten' and 'diffrent'. These lexical inadequacies and repetitive expressions cause some friction and restrict the precision expected in academic writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response displays a very limited range of sentence structures, primarily consisting of long, run-on sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions or simple chronological markers without proper punctuation. There are frequent grammatical errors, including missing punctuation, comma splices (e.g., '1800 was 24% then the year...'), and poor control over complex clauses. These frequent errors in grammar and punctuation can cause difficulty and confusion for the reader in tracking the relationships between the data points.
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