Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Here! Here a chart that is given below that shows the population of New York city from year 1800 to 2000 and all five districts of New York city are Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island.In year 1800 population 79,216 in 1900 population 3,437,202 and in 2000 population 8,009,185. Now first Manhattan district population percentage in year 1800 population 60,515 and 76% in 1900 1,850,093 54% in 2000 19% and in other hand remaning district in 1800 population 16,701 is a 24% in 1900 population 1,587,109 is a 46% and in 2000 population 6,471,089 is a 81% .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response responds to the task only minimally and fails to meet the minimum word length requirement, being significantly under the 150-word threshold. While the student attempts to present some figures from the tables, such as the overall population data for 1800, 1900, and 2000, the selection of information is very basic and lacks a proper overview or well-structured comparisons. Furthermore, there are minor transcription discrepancies, such as reporting 16,701 instead of 18,701 for the other districts in 1800. To reach a higher level, the response must meet the word count requirement, present a clear and comprehensive overview of the main trends, and integrate more detailed comparisons between Manhattan and the other districts across the century marks.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently in this response. The text is presented as a single, dense block of writing without appropriate paragraphing. Cohesive devices are largely absent or misused, leading to a choppy and repetitive delivery where phrases like 'In year 1800 population' and 'in 1900 population' are mechanically repeated. There is no clear logical progression to guide the reader through the data from the tables. To improve, the writer needs to organise the response into logical paragraphs—such as an introduction with an overview, followed by distinct body paragraphs for specific data groups—and employ a wider variety of accurate cohesive devices to connect sentences and ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, heavily relying on direct lifting of terms from the prompt and tables, such as 'population', 'district', and 'year'. There is a lack of flexibility or range, and some inaccuracies appear in word choice and expression, such as 'remaning district' (remaining districts) and 'on other hand' (on the other hand). These lexical shortcomings restrict the ability to discuss the data with precision. To achieve a higher score, the student should incorporate a broader range of vocabulary appropriate for academic reports, using synonyms and paraphrasing (e.g., inhabitants, demographic, proportion, share) alongside correct spelling and more natural collocational phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical range is very limited, consisting almost entirely of fragmented or simple list-like structures rather than complete, well-formed sentences. The response contains frequent errors in basic grammar, including missing verbs, articles, and prepositions (e.g., 'Here! Here a chart that is given below that shows...', 'In year 1800 population 79,216...'). Punctuation is also poorly handled, with run-on phrasing spanning multiple clauses without proper demarcation. To progress, the writer must focus on constructing complete, grammatically sound sentences containing subjects and verbs, and practice using a mix of simple and complex sentence structures with accurate control over tense, agreement, and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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