Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The table provides information about otal population of New York City from 1800 to 2000, and others table show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Overall ,New York City shows massive grothe in last year and most of population lived in manhattan in starting year and leaved that palce over the time and other sates incresed the population in upcoming years .

Firstly ,in year 1800 overall Newyork City population was 79,216 and 76% of peopel lived in manhattan , after 100 year City population grow massively and reach 3,437,202 and 54% of people and 1,850,096 of population lived in manhattan , while in last year population of New York population roketed and reach peak around 8,009,185 and manhattan population went down to 1,538,096 and reached rock down .

Secondly, other districts like brooklyn , bronx, queens, staten island are grow massively in year 1800 other distric population start with 18,701 around 24% of New York city people lived in other districts

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the overall population increase and the shift in population share from Manhattan to the other districts, which are central features. However, the response is incomplete: it gives no figures for the other districts in 1900 or 2000, and the final paragraph stops after describing their 1800 population. The overview’s claim that the city grew “in last year” is unclear, and “leaved that place” does not accurately describe the change in Manhattan’s population: it rose to 1,850,093 in 1900 before falling by 2000. You also report 1,850,096 rather than 1,850,093. The response contains 146 words, below the 150-word minimum; the 31 words copied from the task prompt are not counted. Complete the comparison and report the key later figures accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic structure: an introduction, an overview, and paragraphs beginning “Firstly” and “Secondly.” This gives the reader some sense of organisation, and the time sequence is partly followed. However, progression is weak because the second body paragraph ends after the 1800 figures, leaving the 1900 and 2000 comparison unfinished. Several ideas are crowded into long sentences, especially the paragraph beginning “Firstly,” so the relationships between the city total, Manhattan’s share, and its population are not always clear. Linking phrases such as “after 100 year” and “while in last year” are repetitive and sometimes awkward. Group the data by year or by Manhattan versus the other districts, and use clear transitions to guide each comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt some vocabulary suited to describing change, including “massive growth,” “reach peak,” and “went down.” However, the range is limited and several choices or spellings make the meaning difficult to follow: “grothe,” “roketed,” “rock down,” “sates,” and “incresed.” Some expressions are also imprecise or unnatural, such as “leaved that place” and “in upcoming years.” Repeating “population” and “massively” further limits flexibility. Use accurate, conventional terms for trends and shares, and check spelling carefully. For example, describe the total as having “increased substantially,” and say Manhattan’s population “declined” between 1900 and 2000 rather than saying it “went down” or “reached rock down.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts longer sentences with time clauses and contrast, for example, “after 100 year … while in last year,” but these structures are often faulty. Errors in articles, plurals, and sentence construction occur throughout: “in year 1800,” “after 100 year,” and “54% of people and 1,850,096 of population lived in manhattan” do not form a clear, accurate sentence. Tense and verb forms are also inconsistent, as in “are grow massively” and “population … reach.” Punctuation and spacing around commas are frequently incorrect, and the final paragraph is a sentence fragment. Prefer controlled sentences with a clear subject and verb, such as “In 1900, Manhattan had 1,850,093 residents, representing 54% of the city’s population.”

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