Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The first table alborate changes in the total population of USA state New York from 1800 to 2000. The second and thrid illustreat in the population of five districts of the city [Manhattan,Brookly,Queens,Staten Island] over the same time

First of all Manhattan is very populated as compares to other cities, In1800 the population of Manhattan 60,515 as percentage is 76% and 19 centre,s the population of Manhattan is 1,850,093.

But in 2000 the population is on slightly fall down as compare to other centres .

In 2000 the population is 1,538,096 which is 19%

In other districts the amount of people,s are rose in the potentiol.In 1800 the population of other districts is 18,701. Whcih is 24% .But they will not stop here , in 1900 the population of this districts are at the peak value is 1,587,109. Which is very huge diffrances. As alway in 2000 the population is rose the value is 6,471,089 which is 815

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the main contrast shown in the tables: Manhattan’s share falls over time, while the combined share of the other districts rises. You also include several accurate figures, including Manhattan’s 1800 population and the other districts’ 2000 population. However, the response only minimally covers the task: it omits the overall New York City population figures and gives no clear overview of the city’s substantial growth. The 1900 Manhattan figure is reported as though it belongs to “19 centre,s,” and the final share is written as “815” rather than 81%, so key information is unclear or inaccurate. To strengthen the report, summarise the overall trend first, compare the three years accurately, and distinguish population totals from percentages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has a basic sequence, moving from Manhattan to the other districts, and time markers such as “In 1800,” “in 1900,” and “in 2000” help the reader follow the intended chronology. However, the ideas are not arranged into a clear report structure: there is no distinct overview, and the opening repeats the task rather than introducing the main findings. Connections between sentences are often unclear, as in “But they will not stop here,” which does not explain the comparison, and “As alway in 2000” is difficult to interpret. Use separate introduction, overview, and detail paragraphs, and connect comparisons with precise linking phrases such as “whereas” and “by contrast.”

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to describing data, including “population,” “percentage,” “peak value,” and “differences.” However, the range is basic and several word choices or spelling errors make the report difficult to understand. Examples include “alborate,” “illustreat,” “potentiol,” and “diffrances”; “other cities” is also inaccurate when referring to districts. Phrases such as “the population … is on slightly fall down” and “the amount of people’s are rose” are not natural ways to describe trends. Build a small set of accurate data-reporting expressions, such as “increased,” “declined,” “accounted for,” and “the combined population of the other districts,” and check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response mainly uses short, simple statements and attempts a few longer structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes obscure the intended meaning. For example, “the population of Manhattan 60,515” is missing a verb, while “the population … are at the peak value” has incorrect agreement and an awkward sentence structure. Tense and clause formation are also unreliable in “they will not stop here” and “Which is very huge differences.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries need attention: several fragments begin with “Which,” and commas are used inconsistently. Practise complete subject–verb sentences and accurate past-tense reporting, for example, “Manhattan’s population stood at 60,515 in 1800.”

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