Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The first tables depicts the changes in the total popultaion of New York city between 1800 to 2000 while the other two tables show the changes of population in five district Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island during the same period.

Overall, the population in New york city of all five districts increases gradually over the period of time.However, the precentage of total population in Manhanttan shows a rapid decline.In other districts the population increases rapidly.

In 1800, the population of New york city in all five district is at 79,216.while in 1900 its poulation increases and reached at about 3,437,202.In 2000, the population grew gradually and stood at around 8,009,185.

In Manhattan, the population shows a significant decrease over the period of time In 1800 its popualtion is at 76 percent,but in 1900 its shows a slight decrease at about 54 percent .In 2000, the population shows a decline and reached at 19 percent.whereas the population in other districtcs shows a rapid increase in population at first it its population is around 24 percent moreever, in 2000 its poulation peaked at about 81.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall contrast: New York’s total population rose substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ share grew. The total figures are reported accurately, and the 1800, 1900 and 2000 percentages for both groups are included. This covers the task well, with some evidence of the more detailed comparison expected at a higher level. However, the overview says the city’s population increased “gradually,” which understates the very large growth, and the account of the district populations is incomplete: Manhattan’s actual population rose to 1,850,093 in 1900 before falling to 1,538,096, while the other districts’ population increased from 18,701 to 6,471,089. Include these absolute figures and distinguish them from percentages to make the key trends clearer and more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. It also uses basic linking expressions such as “Overall,” “However” and “whereas,” so the reader can follow the broad comparison. Cohesion is less successful within the detail paragraph, where the shift from Manhattan to the other districts is abrupt, and several sentences run together without clear punctuation, for example, “In 2000, the population shows a decline and reached at 19 percent.whereas…”. The repeated “In 1800” and “In 2000” openings also make the progression mechanical. Group the figures by time period or by population versus share, and use clear sentence boundaries and references to guide the reader through each comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant task vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “decline,” “increases” and “peaked,” and the main meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several choices are imprecise or repetitive. “Increases gradually” does not accurately convey the scale of the city’s growth, while “population shows a significant decrease” confuses Manhattan’s population with its percentage share, since its population first rose and then fell. Phrases such as “population in other districts shows a rapid increase in population” repeat the same noun rather than expressing the comparison efficiently. Spelling errors, including “popultaion,” “Manhanttan” and “districtcs,” also reduce control. Use precise terms such as “population share,” “rose sharply,” and “accounted for” to report the data more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more developed sentence forms, including a contrast with “while” and a clause introduced by “whereas.” The overall message remains understandable, but errors in sentence construction, verb forms and punctuation are noticeable. For example, “between 1800 to 2000” uses an incorrect preposition pattern; “the population … is at 79,216” shifts into the present tense; and “in 1900 its shows” has an incorrect subject–verb construction. Several sentence boundaries are also missing, as in “79,216.while” and “19 percent.whereas,” making the text harder to read. Use past-tense reporting consistently, check subject–verb agreement, and separate each complete sentence with appropriate punctuation. More accurate control of these patterns would make your comparisons clearer.

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