Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

IN 1800 TO 2000 THE POPULATION OF NEW YORK HAVE A LOT OF DIFFERENCE.IF WE SAW THW POPULATION OF NEW YORK CITY IN 1800,IT WAS ABOUT 79,216 BUT AFTER 100 YEAR LATER IN 1900 IT WAS [redacted phone] AND IN 2000 IT WAS [redacted phone].IT CLEARLY SHOWS THAT THE RATE OF POPULATION WAS VERY HIGH DURING THE PERIOD OF 1900.AND IF WE SAW THE POPULATION OF MANATHAN CITY THE RATE OF POPULATION WAS ALSO HIGH DURING THE PERIOD OF 1900, BUT IF WE COMPARE THE POPULATION RATE OF NEW YORK CITY TO MANATHAN CITY AND OTHER FIVE DISTRICT THAT ARE MENTION IN THE THIRD TABE, WE CAN CLEARLY SEE THAT DURING 2000 NEW YORK AND MANATHAN THE RATE OF THE POPULATION WAS AS COMPARED TO OTHER MENTIONED CITIES.BUT THE POPULATION RATE OF NEW YORK AND MANATHAN CITIES IN THE 1800 IT WAS HIGH TO THESE FIVE DISTRICT.SO THE TABLW SHOWS THE POPULATION OF THESE CITIES IN DIFFERENT CENTURIES.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response includes the overall city population at all three dates and recognises that Manhattan’s share fell while the other districts’ share rose. However, the main comparisons are often unclear or inaccurate: the claim that New York and Manhattan had a higher population rate than the other districts in 2000 conflicts with the figures, since the other districts accounted for 81% of the total. The statement that Manhattan’s population was high in 1900 also misses that it declined by 2000. The overview is vague, and the response does not clearly report the key shift in population distribution. Select the main trends and compare them accurately, using the table’s figures to support each point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response attempts to move chronologically from 1800 to 2000 and uses linking expressions such as “but,” “and,” and “so.” However, it is presented as one long block, with no clear separation between an overview and supporting details. Repeated openings such as “if we saw” make the progression mechanical, while several comparisons are difficult to follow, particularly the sentence beginning “if we compare the population rate.” The reference to “these five district” is also unclear because Manhattan is being compared with the other four districts collectively. Organise the report into clear paragraphs and use direct comparisons, with pronouns and labels that make each group unmistakable.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying heavily on “population,” “rate,” “high,” and “different.” Some wording is imprecise for describing table data: “a lot of difference” does not clearly express the substantial increase, and “population rate” is not the right term for population size or share. There are also spelling errors, including “Manathan,” “thw,” and “tabe,” which reduce accuracy and polish. The response does convey a few relevant concepts, such as “percentage” implied by its comparisons and “period,” but needs a more varied and precise range. Practise terms such as “rose,” “declined,” “accounted for,” and “proportion” to describe trends and shares.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentences using “but,” “if,” and “so,” but control is weak and the sentence structures are often difficult to follow. Errors include “the population … have,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “after 100 year later,” which has faulty number and time phrasing. Missing or misplaced punctuation creates run-on sentences, especially in the long comparison beginning “AND IF WE SAW.” Capitalisation is also inconsistent. These problems sometimes obscure the intended comparisons. Build accuracy first with short, complete sentences, then combine related points using controlled clauses. Check agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries during revision.

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