Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The first table shows changes in the population of New York City from 1800 to 2000, while second and third tables show changes in the population of all the five districts of the city including Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island over the same period.

In first table, in the year of 1800, lowest population was seen meanwhile in 2000, population increases in all the five districts. By comparing percentages from second and third table, the highest percentage was seen in Other districts in the year of 2000 comprises 81%. In the Manhattan in the same year least percentage was seen comprises 19%.

Infact, the number of population was seen higher in other districts as compared to Manhattan. In 1900 number of population in Manhattan and other districts have a little difference comprises 54% and 46% respectively.

Overall, a major change was seen by combing all five districts, that in the year 2000 highest number of population was deducted as compared to other years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the broad time span and report the key shift in the districts’ shares: Manhattan falls from 76% to 19%, while the other districts rise to 81% by 2000. However, the response gives very little of the overall population data: it does not report the totals for 1800, 1900 or 2000, and it misses that Manhattan’s population rose to a peak in 1900 before declining. The statement that population “increases in all the five districts” is not supported by the tables, which group four districts together. The overview is also unclear, especially “highest number ... was deducted.” The response is 146 words, below the 150-word minimum; 19 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Add accurate figures and a clearer summary of the main trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs and attempts to move from an introduction to comparisons and a concluding overview. It also uses basic linking expressions such as “while,” “By comparing,” and “Overall.” However, the progression is difficult to follow because the main population totals are not presented and the comparisons are not organised by time or trend. The second paragraph combines an unclear claim about the lowest population with the 2000 percentage comparison, while “Infact” introduces a point that largely repeats the previous one. The final sentence does not clearly summarise the data. Group the response into an introduction, a concise overview, and paragraphs comparing the figures across the three years; use references such as “this share” only when their meaning is clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “districts,” and “compared to,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations make the meaning unclear. “Population was deducted” does not express an increase or a total, and “comprises 81%” is not a natural way to report a share. “Infact” is also incorrectly written as one word, and “a little difference” is imprecise for the 54% versus 46% comparison. Choose precise reporting language such as “accounted for,” “rose,” “fell,” and “the largest share,” and check spelling and collocations. This would make the comparisons easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a contrast with “while” and a comparison introduced by “By comparing.” However, sentence structures are often faulty, and errors in articles, agreement, tense and sentence construction sometimes obscure the intended meaning. For example, “while second and third tables show” needs articles, and “In the Manhattan ... least percentage was seen comprises 19%” combines incomplete and incompatible structures. “In 1900 number ... have a little difference” also has an incorrect verb form and missing articles. Practise building clear subject–verb sentences, for example, “Manhattan’s share fell to 19% in 2000, while the other districts’ share rose to 81%.” Use past-tense verbs consistently when describing the historical figures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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