Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given first table represents changes in total population of New York from 1800 to 2000 . The rest of two tables shows the changes in population of Manhattan, Brooklyn,Bronx,Queens,Staten Island over the same period.

Overall, the population increased from beggining to ending minimum percentile was in starting year and maximum was in ending year.

It is clear that in Manhattan percentum was high in starting year was 76% and less in ending year was 19 percent respectively. In 1900 the percentum was 54 % which was higher then other districts by 46%.

Moreover, population in 1800was 79,216 which was respectively less then 2000 was 8,009,185. In other districts the population was 81 % in year 2000 and 24% in 1800.While 1,587,109 number of persons live in Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens,Staten Islan in 1900 respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad rise in New York’s population and report several relevant figures, including the city totals for 1800 and 2000 and Manhattan’s changing share. However, the overview is unclear: “minimum percentile” and “maximum” do not explain the main population pattern, and the response omits the key fact that Manhattan’s population rose to a peak in 1900 before falling by 2000. The comparison that Manhattan’s 1900 share was “higher then other districts by 46%” is also inaccurate: the figures are 54% and 46%, an eight-percentage-point difference. The response contains 127 words, below the required 150, so the summary is underdeveloped. Select the main trends accurately and explain them with clear comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, with an introduction, an attempted overview and two detail paragraphs. Some linking words, such as “Overall,” “Moreover” and “While,” show an effort to connect information. However, progression is difficult to follow because the overview is vague and the details move between percentages and population totals without a clear organising principle. The final sentence beginning “While” is not integrated smoothly with the preceding point, and the reference to “other districts” does not clearly distinguish their combined population from the individual boroughs. Organise the body by comparing Manhattan with the other districts across the three years, and use linking phrases only where they clarify the relationship between figures.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “population,” “increased,” “percent” and “districts,” so the reader can identify the topic and several comparisons. However, the range is limited, and inaccurate or awkward choices sometimes obscure meaning. “Percentum” is not the appropriate term; use “percentage” or “proportion.” “Minimum percentile” does not describe the lowest population, while “respectively” is used where it does not fit the sentence. There are also spelling and spacing problems, such as “beggining,” “Islan” and “1800was.” Aim for precise language for trends and shares, such as “rose,” “declined,” “accounted for” and “combined population,” and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple statements and more developed sentence forms, but grammatical control is inconsistent and errors frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. For example, “Overall, the population increased from beggining to ending minimum percentile was…” joins several ideas without a workable sentence structure. In “in Manhattan percentum was high in starting year was 76%,” the clauses are not formed correctly, and “which was higher then other districts by 46%” lacks a clear comparison structure. The final “While” clause is also left without a complete main clause. Use shorter, complete sentences first, with accurate subjects and verbs, then practise linking them with “whereas” or “while.” Check punctuation and spacing between sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.