Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The data in the first table, illustrates the information about changes in the total population of New York city from 1800 to 2000 moreover, second and third tables illustrates the data on changescin population of the five districts of the city in the the meantime.

Overall, the first table demonstrates the information about population in New York city which drastically surged in 2000. Whereas, in second table the data provided information on changes in Manhattan population only which is the district of New York. The table dipict the changes in percentage of population over the years from [redacted phone].

changes in population in both second and third table demonstrates that population in 1800 was less than in 2000. Other districts population surge in 2000

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the broad subject and mention that New York’s population increased, but the response does not adequately summarise the tables. The overview says the total population “drastically surged in 2000,” without comparing the three years, and the claim that the second table gives information on Manhattan “only” misses the important contrast with the other districts. You also state only that populations were lower in 1800 than in 2000, omitting the key change that Manhattan’s population fell between 1900 and 2000 while the other districts grew substantially. The response is 102 words, below the 150-word minimum; 21 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Include accurate figures and the main comparisons to develop the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into an introduction, an overview and a final paragraph, and words such as “Overall” and “Whereas” signal relationships between ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the paragraphs repeat general statements rather than presenting the data in a clear sequence. For example, the final paragraph says that populations in both tables were lower in 1800 than in 2000, but does not distinguish Manhattan’s decline after 1900 from the growth elsewhere. Some linking is also awkward: “Whereas” begins a fragment, and “moreover” does not clearly connect the two parts of the introduction. Group the overview around the main contrast, then report the figures in a logical order.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant vocabulary, including “total population,” “district,” “percentage” and “surged,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is limited and several choices are repetitive or imprecise: “the data … illustrates the information” is unnecessarily wordy, while “population … was less than” is vague when describing changes. There are also spelling and word-form errors, including “dipict” and “changescin,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for concise, precise language for describing tables, such as “rose,” “declined,” “accounted for” and “share.” Check spelling and use collocations that clearly identify whether you mean population size or percentage of the total.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some sentence variety, including a relative clause in “which is the district of New York” and a comparison introduced by “Whereas.” However, control is inconsistent. The opening sentence has a comma separating the subject from its verb (“The data …, illustrates”), and the second sentence contains agreement problems (“tables illustrates”). The “Whereas” clause is not joined to a complete main clause, and the final paragraph lacks a clear article or possessive construction in “Other districts population.” Punctuation and sentence boundaries also need attention, particularly in the opening, where several ideas run together. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them accurately using contrast and comparison structures.

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