Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The tables compare the data of the number population in New York City and the percentage of population in five district [Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island in 1800 and 2000.

Overall, the number of population in new work city increase significantly throughout the period.At the biginning, Manhattan district had more then number of population other district.

The population of New York City rose every century. In 1800, 1900 and 2000, pupolation was 79,216, 3,437,202 and 8,009,185, Respectively. From 1800 to 2000, the number of population were shot up from 60,515 to 1,538,096 over the peiod. In contrast, the proportion of total population decreased in Manhattan and in other district the percentage of population inclined.

Between 1800 and 1900, the percentage of total population declined from 76% to 54% and in 2000, dropped by 35%. While, in other 4 district grew up from 24% to 46% and from 46% to 81%. Respectively, through out the period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall pattern: New York City’s population grew substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ combined share rose. The figures for the city total and the percentages are generally reported accurately, and the comparison between 1800 and 1900 is relevant. However, some key details are unclear or incomplete. For example, “dropped by 35%” does not clearly state that Manhattan’s share fell from 54% to 19%, and the population figures for the other districts are not reported. The overview also says Manhattan had more people than the other districts initially, but does not summarise the later reversal. Make the main comparisons explicit and distinguish population totals from percentages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and paragraphs containing details. Its main ideas can generally be followed, and phrases such as “In contrast” signal a comparison. However, progression is weakened by unclear links and sentence fragments, particularly “While, in other 4 district grew up…” and “Respectively, through out the period.” The final paragraph repeats percentage changes without clearly connecting them to the earlier discussion. Group the information more deliberately—for example, describe the city’s total population first, then compare Manhattan with the combined other districts—and use complete sentences. This would make the organisation more coherent and reduce the impression of loosely connected details.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “percentage,” “proportion,” “declined” and “in contrast,” so the reader can understand the broad comparisons. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning less clear. “Number of population” is not natural English; use “population” or “population total.” “Shot up” is informal for an academic report, while “inclined” does not accurately describe a percentage increasing. There are also spelling errors such as “biginning,” “pupolation” and “peiod.” Aim for precise, neutral reporting language and check spelling carefully. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the basic trends, but accuracy and natural phrasing need improvement.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex forms, including a contrast introduced by “While,” and most of the intended meaning is recoverable. However, errors in sentence construction, agreement and verb forms are noticeable. For example, “the number of population … increase” needs a singular past-tense verb, and “the number of population were shot up” has an incorrect subject–verb pattern and verb form. The opening sentence is also incomplete, with an unmatched parenthesis and no clear closing structure. Punctuation and spacing are inconsistent, and the final “Respectively” fragment is not a complete sentence. Practise writing complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, then check tense consistency and punctuation.

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