Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The three given tables illustrate the information of population at five different New York's cities all together and seperate between 1800 and 2000.

Overall, number of population in all New York cities had increased over the period along with percentage of total population except Manhatten's contribution in total populatio. However, population of this city had also inclined with time.

Total population of New York city was 79,216 in 1800 ,and 76% of this population was from Manhattan with 60,515 people.The remained 18,701 people which accounted for 24% were from other districts such as Brooklyne,Bronx,Queens and Staten Island. In 1900, population of Manhattan rose three times and reached to 1.8 million approximately;however, in total percentage , ratio declined from 76% to 54%. Remaining 46% population from other districts.

The opposite trend can be seen in 2000's population distributions. Matthattan had only 19% proportion of total population which was 1,538,096 of total 8,009,185 population of total New York in 2000. Others districts recorded the highest population with 81% contribution in total.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall pattern: New York’s total population grew, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ share rose. The key figures for 1800 and 2000 are reported accurately, and the 1900 comparison captures Manhattan’s rising population alongside its declining proportion. However, some important information is underdeveloped: the total population’s increase to 3,437,202 in 1900 is not stated, and the other districts’ population growth is described mainly through percentages rather than figures. The overview also says the other districts’ percentage increased, but could make the contrast with Manhattan more precise. Include the total at each date and compare the absolute population changes as well as the shares.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, an overview, and chronological detail for 1800, 1900 and 2000. This gives the reader a coherent route through the data, and phrases such as “In 1900” and “The opposite trend” help signal comparisons. The progression is not fully smooth, however. “Remaining 46% population from other districts” is a fragment, and the shift from the 1900 figures to the 2000 comparison would be clearer if the other districts’ population were explicitly linked across the years. Some linking is also mechanical. Use complete sentences and connect each year’s figures directly to the preceding trend so that the comparisons are easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for describing data, including “accounted for,” “proportion,” “declined,” and “contribution.” These choices show an attempt to vary language rather than repeat “population” throughout. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “information of population,” “population … had inclined,” and “the remained 18,701 people.” There are also spelling errors in “seperate,” “Manhatten,” and “Brooklyne,” which reduce precision in a data report. Prefer standard chart language such as “population figures,” “increased,” and “the remaining 18,701 people,” and check the spelling of place names. More accurate collocations would make the meaning clearer and more formal.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “although” implied by “however” and a relative clause in “which accounted for 24%.” The main comparisons are generally understandable. Some grammatical errors remain, though, and they affect sentence control: “Overall, number of population” is missing an article and uses an awkward noun structure; “Remaining 46% population from other districts” is not a complete sentence; and “in 2000’s population distributions” uses an incorrect possessive construction. Punctuation spacing is also inconsistent, particularly around commas and semicolons. Build complete clauses, use articles consistently, and check sentence boundaries and punctuation while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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