Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The Tables give information about the changes in overall population and five districts of New York City over the same period of time.

Overall, highest number of population was recorded in the year 2000. Also Manhattan became the most populated district compared to the rest.

The population has increased dramaticaly since 1800s with (60,515) to ([redacted phone]) in manhattan district. it increased upto 54% in 100 years from 1800 to 1900. it also increased from 1900 to 2000 but not that fast with 19%.

Other Districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, and Staten Island) Also seen massive population changes, over three centuries from 1800 to 2000.

The total population of these combined districts were 18701 in the year 1800.

and increased to [redacted phone] in the year 1900. and best part was, the population increased massive upto 81% in the year 2000, with 64,71089

from 1,8701

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the broad rise in New York City’s population and include figures for Manhattan and the other districts. However, the overview contains a major misreading: Manhattan was not the most populated district in 2000; its population fell from 1,850,093 in 1900 to 1,538,096 in 2000, while the other four districts together reached 6,471,089. The statement that Manhattan’s population increased to 1,538,096 also reverses the trend, and the percentages are confused with population growth. The citywide totals are omitted, so the main overall change is not fully reported. The response is also 8 words below the required minimum. Select the key comparisons accurately and distinguish population figures from percentages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic structure, with an introduction, an overview and separate discussion of Manhattan and the other districts. This gives the reader some sense of how the information is grouped. However, progression is difficult to follow because several sentences are fragments or begin with “and,” such as “and increased to 1587109” and “and best part was.” The final line, “from 1,8701,” is unclear and does not complete the comparison. Connections between the figures and their years are also sometimes confusing. Use complete sentences, organise each district’s figures in chronological order, and use clear linking phrases to show whether a value is a population or a percentage.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for describing data, including “overall population,” “districts,” “increased” and “massive population changes.” This shows a basic ability to discuss the topic, but the range is limited and several choices are imprecise or informal. “Best part was” is not suitable for a neutral report, while “increased dramatically” is inaccurate for Manhattan because its population declined after 1900. Spelling and number presentation also reduce clarity, as in “dramaticaly” and “64,71089.” Choose precise trend language, such as “rose,” “fell” and “accounted for,” and write large figures consistently with commas. Avoid evaluative expressions and check that each verb matches the data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few different sentence forms, including an overview and sentences comparing changes over time, but control is inconsistent. Errors frequently affect sentence completeness and clarity: “and increased to 1587109” is a fragment, and “The population has increased … with (60,515) to (1538096)” has an unclear grammatical pattern. There are also problems with articles and agreement in “Overall, highest number of population,” and punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, including lowercase “it” after a full stop. Use straightforward complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, for example, “Manhattan’s population rose to … by 1900, then fell to … by 2000.” Check tense, articles and sentence boundaries carefully.

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