Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The tables depicts the data of total population of the New York City from 19th century to 20th century.
Over the time, the population in all the five districts of the New York City has grown. Although a huge spike was observed in the population in 1900s as compared to the1800s. And the population grown to about 2.5 times in 2000.
Furthurmore, in 1800, Manhattan alone was holding 76% of the total population of New York i.e. 60515. The percentage got lowered to 54% ([redacted phone]) in 1900 and the lowest in 2000 at 19% ([redacted phone]).
Wherease, other districts of New York i.e. Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island were holding only 24% (18701) of the total population. The number grown to [redacted phone] in 1900 making it 46% of the people and increased by almost 4 times in 2000 making it [redacted phone] (81%) of the total population.
In conclusion, over the period of these 200 years, the overall population of the New York City has increased. Moreover, Manhattan's population has declined over the years and the other districts of New York City have gotten populated.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0
You identify the main contrast accurately: Manhattan’s share falls from 76% to 19%, while the other districts’ share rises from 24% to 81%. The figures you give for each period are also consistent with the tables, and your conclusion captures the broad shift in population distribution. This is a clear response to the task with relevant comparisons. However, the overview is not fully precise: saying that the population in all five districts grew overlooks Manhattan’s decline between 1900 and 2000, and “about 2.5 times” does not clearly state what is being compared. Make the overall population trend explicit, then distinguish it from Manhattan’s later fall and the continued growth of the other districts.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, separate paragraphs for Manhattan and the other districts, and a concluding summary. This gives the reader a generally clear route through the information, and contrast markers such as “Although” and “Wherease” show an attempt to connect comparisons. To make the progression more consistently clear, avoid repeating the conclusion after the overview and use the overview to state the key trends directly. Some links are awkward or incomplete: “Although a huge spike was observed…” is a fragment, while “Furthermore” does not clearly signal the shift from the overall trend to Manhattan. More precise transitions and clearer references would make cohesion less mechanical and strengthen the flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant task vocabulary, including “total population,” “percentage,” “declined,” and “increased,” so the main information is understandable. There is also some attempt at more formal phrasing, such as “over the period.” However, the range and control are limited by repeated general words such as “population,” “grown,” and “increased,” and several expressions are unnatural or imprecise: “was holding 76%,” “got lowered,” and “gotten populated.” Spelling errors such as “Furthurmore” and “Wherease” are noticeable. Aim for accurate collocations and a wider set of trend verbs, for example “accounted for,” “fell,” “rose,” and “expanded,” while checking spelling and avoiding conversational phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex forms, including comparisons across years and the concluding sentence beginning “Moreover.” However, control is uneven, and several sentence-level errors affect clarity. “The tables depicts” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “Although a huge spike was observed…” is an incomplete subordinate clause. In “the population grown to about 2.5 times,” the verb form and comparison structure are faulty. Articles and prepositions are also inconsistent in phrases such as “the New York City” and “in 1900s.” Use complete sentences, check agreement and verb forms, and express comparisons with a clear structure, such as “the total population was about 2.3 times higher in 2000 than in 1900.”
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