Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the new york in 1800 year the population was 79,216 and which was increased in sun 1900 about 3,437,202 and sun 2000 it was increased about 8,009,185 so this is the whole population enhance in new yourk now we talk about the district population of new yourk so how many population increase in district and what is the effect on Districts so in the year of 1800 the Manhattan population was 60,515 as a according to the percentage about 76% and in 1900 the population was 1,850,093 in 2000 the Manhattan population was 1,548,096 same as like other districts So this is the effect of increse population in New York and its districts

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You include some relevant figures, such as the city’s population in 1800, 1900 and 2000, and Manhattan’s 1800 and 1900 populations. However, the summary is minimal and does not clearly identify the main pattern: the city grew substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ share rose. The 2000 Manhattan figure is also inaccurate: the table gives 1,538,096, not 1,548,096. You do not report the other districts’ figures or percentages, so an important comparison is missing. The response also falls short of the required 150 words. To improve, give a clear overview and select key comparisons from both tables, checking each figure against the source.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic sequence from the city-wide population to Manhattan, which gives the reader some sense of the intended topic. However, the response is presented as one long sentence-like paragraph, and the ideas are not arranged into a clear report structure. Phrases such as “now we talk about” and “so this is the effect” do not establish useful links between data points, while “same as like other districts” leaves the comparison unclear. Organise the response into an introduction, an overview, and one or two paragraphs comparing the figures. Use clear links such as “By contrast” to show how Manhattan’s trend differs from that of the other districts.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “population,” “district,” and “percentage,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and several choices make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “increased in sun 1900” and “population enhance” do not express the intended trend naturally; “effect on Districts” is also vague for describing population changes. Spelling errors such as “new yourk” and “increse” further reduce clarity. Build a more precise range for describing tables, including terms for growth, decline, proportions and comparisons, and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to report figures using past-tense forms, for example, “the population was 79,216,” and you include some simple clauses. However, sentence structures are very limited, and frequent errors make relationships between ideas unclear. The opening, “In the new york in 1800 year the population was 79,216 and which was increased,” has problems with word order, articles and clause construction. The long run-on sequence that follows lacks reliable sentence boundaries, and “in 2000 the Manhattan population was…” is not connected clearly to the preceding information. Practise writing short, complete sentences with accurate past-tense verbs, then combine them using controlled linking clauses and correct punctuation.

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