Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The table ilustrate the total number of people of New York city from 1800 to 2000.The population was rised dramatically. The lowest number of population was in 1800 and it rised surprisingly at 2000.The second table demonstrate population in Manhattan from 1800 to 2000 where the percentage of population was gradually decline. In 1800, the population was only 60515 and the total percentage was highest compared to other year. Additionally the lowest percentage was in 2000 whereas the population was highest in number.Furthermore, compared to other districts such as Brooklyn,Bronx, Queens and Staten Island which ilustrated in table three,the figures of population was completely different for Manhattan. The population was increased dramatically and highest was in 2000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the broad population increase and the changing shares of Manhattan and the other districts, but the report is incomplete and some comparisons are unclear. For example, you say Manhattan’s population was highest in 2000, although it peaked in 1900 at 1,850,093 and then fell to 1,538,096. You also do not report the city’s total figures or the other districts’ actual population figures, so key information is missing. The response contains 109 words, below the required 150; this limits how fully you can select and explain the main features. Add a clear overview and accurate comparisons, including the rise in the other districts’ share from 24% to 81%.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a basic sequence, moving from the city total to Manhattan and then the other districts, and linking words such as “Additionally” and “Furthermore” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, it is presented as one continuous paragraph, with no clear introduction or separate overview, and the progression between comparisons is difficult to follow. The final sentence says the other districts’ population increased, but does not clearly contrast this with Manhattan’s decline after 1900. Some linking is also mechanical, and references such as “the lowest percentage” require the reader to infer which group is meant. Organise the report into clear paragraphs and use explicit comparisons to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “districts,” and “dramatically,” so the subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate or repetitive. “The table illustrate” would be more naturally expressed as “the table shows,” while “the population was rised” and “it rised surprisingly” misuse the verb and adverb. “The figures of population was completely different” is vague and awkward; specify how the figures changed or differed. Spelling errors such as “ilustrate” also reduce accuracy. Build a wider set of precise reporting verbs and comparison phrases, and check spelling and collocations before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate several basic ideas using simple sentences and some subordinate clauses, for example, “where the percentage of population was gradually decline.” However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries. Examples include “The table ilustrate,” “The population was rised,” and “the figures of population was.” The sentence beginning “Furthermore, compared to other districts…” is also difficult to control and ends without a clear grammatical comparison. Several sentences run together without spaces after full stops. Practise accurate past-tense forms and subject–verb agreement, then use a few controlled complex sentences to compare the three years.

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