Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The table provides the information about the changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000 and compares it with Manhattan's and other four districts population over the same time period.

Overall, New York had a dramatically increase in its population. Moreover, Manhattan also faced rapid increase but also faced a slight downfall in 2000. Furthermore, the other four districts also had an incredible rise throughout the period.

In 1800, New York's population was about 79,216 that increases considerably to 8,009,185 in 2000. Manhattan also experienced a rapid change after a slight downfall in 1900 as it increases from 60,515 to 1,538,096. But with respect to the total percentage, it faced a great decline from 76% to 19%.

In contract, other four districts (Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) also had a considerable rise over the period as their population increases from 18,701 to 6,471,089 . The average percentage of total population also boost from 24 to 81.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main overall pattern: New York City’s population grew substantially, while Manhattan’s share fell and the other districts’ share rose. You also include relevant figures for 1800 and 2000. However, the account is incomplete: it omits the city’s 1900 total and Manhattan’s 1900 population and share, and it incorrectly describes Manhattan as having a “slight downfall in 1900” before rising. In fact, Manhattan peaked in 1900 and then declined by 2000. The overview would be stronger if it clearly highlighted this contrast and the shift in population towards the other districts. The response is 148 words, below the 150-word minimum; 13 words copied from the prompt were not counted.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, an overview and two detail paragraphs. The contrast signalled by “In contract” also helps the reader follow the comparison. However, the progression is weakened because the body paragraphs report only the starting and ending figures, leaving the important 1900 stage unexplained. Some linking is mechanical: “Moreover” and “Furthermore” repeat the same additive function in the overview, while “But” begins a sentence without making the comparison especially clear. Improve cohesion by grouping the figures chronologically or comparing Manhattan with the other districts at each date, and use references such as “this share” only when their meaning is unmistakable.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of task-related vocabulary, including “population,” “percentage,” “decline,” “considerable” and “throughout the period.” These choices make the topic clear, but several word-choice and collocation errors reduce precision. “A dramatically increase” is not a natural phrase, “faced rapid increase” is awkward, and “the average percentage … boost” does not accurately describe a rise in the districts’ combined share. “In contract” is also an incorrect expression for introducing a contrast. Aim for precise reporting language and avoid repeating broad terms such as “rise” and “increase”; alternatives like “grew,” “accounted for” and “fell to” can describe the data more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “as” and “but,” and the main message is generally understandable. However, errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences awkward. Examples include “a dramatically increase,” “that increases considerably,” and “as it increases,” where articles, word forms or verb forms are not controlled. The sentence about Manhattan’s change is also difficult to follow because the sequence of events is unclear. Check subject–verb agreement and maintain consistent past-tense reporting: for example, “the population increased” and “Manhattan’s population then fell.” More accurate sentence patterns would make your comparisons easier to understand.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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