Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

the tables illastrate changes in the population of new york city sa a whole and the population distribution between manhattan and the other four districts in 1800,1900 and 2000

overall, new york city's population increased significantly over the 200 year period.while manhttan accounted for the largest proportion of the total population in 1900, the other four districts had a much greater share by 2000.

in 1800, the total population of new york city was 79,216 of this figure, 60,515 people lived in manhattan, representing 76%

of the city's population in comparison, the orther four districts had a combined population of only 18,701 which accounted for 24%.

over the following entury, the city population grew dramatically to 3,437,202 in 1900, manhattan's population rose sharply to 1,850,093 making up 54% of the total, meanwhile, the combined population of brooklyn, the bronx, queens and staten island reacher 1,538,096 representing the remaining 46% by 2000, new york city's population had increased further to 8,009,185 however manhattan's population fell to 1,538,096 and its share of the total dropped considerably to 19% in contrast the other four districts experienced substantial growth, reaching 6,471,089 people or 81% of the city's populations .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You cover the main changes and make relevant comparisons across all three years. The overview correctly identifies the city’s substantial growth and the shift from Manhattan’s dominance to the other districts’ larger share by 2000. Most figures are accurate, including the total populations and the 1800 and 2000 district figures. However, there is an important factual error: in 1900, 1,538,096 is given as the combined population of the other districts, but this is actually Manhattan’s 2000 population; the other districts’ 1900 population was 1,587,109. This also makes the 1900 comparison inaccurate. The response meets the task well overall, but checking and explaining the middle-year data more carefully would make its coverage more complete and precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a summary of the main trend, and chronological detail. This makes the information easy to follow, and phrases such as “in comparison” and “in contrast” help signal comparisons. However, the final paragraph runs several stages together in a single block, with few full stops or clear transitions between 1900 and 2000. As a result, the reader has to work harder to distinguish the figures for each year. Some linking is also mechanical, and the long sequence beginning “over the following century” would be clearer if divided into separate sentences or paragraphs. More controlled punctuation and explicit year-by-year transitions would strengthen the progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-relevant vocabulary, including “accounted for,” “combined population,” “representing,” “share,” and “substantial growth.” These choices help describe proportions and changes, and the meaning is generally clear. There are, however, several spelling errors, including “illastrate,” “manhttan,” “orther,” and “entury,” as well as some imprecise phrasing such as “the remaining 46%” when describing the other districts’ share. “Population distribution” is appropriate, but the repeated use of “population” and “total” could be varied with terms such as “residents” and “overall figure.” Greater spelling accuracy and more precise collocations would make the vocabulary more controlled and flexible.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex structures, including the contrast in “while Manhattan accounted for the largest proportion …, the other four districts had a much greater share by 2000.” The main trends remain understandable, but some grammatical and punctuation errors reduce accuracy. For example, “the city population grew dramatically to 3,437,202 in 1900, manhattan's population rose…” joins independent clauses with only a comma, and the long final section lacks sentence boundaries. There are also errors in verb forms, such as “the combined population … reacher,” and missing or inconsistent articles and capitalisation. Use full stops to separate the years, check subject–verb forms, and proofread sentence boundaries; this will preserve your range while improving control.

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