Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Overall, the total population New York City in 1800 the total population number was 79,216 and most of people live in Manhattan 76% and other people lived in other districts.

By 1900, the population grew in New York City and came to 3,437,202 and 54% of all population lived in Manhattan.

IN 2000, population increased came to 8,009,185 and 19% population lived in Manhattan.

In 30 years, the population of New york City increased and in Manhattan population was decreased.

So day dy day, New York City population increased and in Manhattan population was decreased people leaved Manhattan and go to other districts and set there.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify the broad pattern that New York City’s population grew and Manhattan’s share declined, and you include relevant figures for 1800, 1900 and 2000. However, the response only partially summarises the tables: it gives no overview of the striking shift in population towards the other four districts, whose share rose from 24% to 81%, and it does not compare their population totals. The claim that people left Manhattan and settled elsewhere is not established by the tables, which show population changes rather than migration. Also, the response is 106 words, below the 150-word minimum; 45 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop the key comparisons and report the data more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a basic chronological order, moving from 1800 to 1900 and then 2000, so the reader can identify the periods being discussed. However, the ideas are not organised into a clear overview and supporting comparisons, and the final two sentences repeat the same general point about population growth and Manhattan’s decline. Linking is limited, while phrases such as “So day dy day” do not create a clear logical connection. Use separate paragraphs for an overview and the main details, then connect comparisons explicitly—for example, contrast Manhattan’s falling share with the other districts’ rising share. Clearer sequencing and less repetition would make the information easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “total population,” “increased” and “districts,” and the main subject is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the total population number,” “population increased came to” and “people leaved Manhattan.” Repetition of “population” and “increased” also makes the summary less precise. Choose concise reporting language and vary it where appropriate: for example, describe a population as “rose to” a figure, and a share as “accounted for” a percentage. Check spelling and word forms as well, including “New York” and “left.” These improvements would make the comparisons clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences use simple structures, and the chronological references help convey the intended meaning. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes make the relationships between ideas difficult to understand. For example, “the total population New York City in 1800 the total population number was” lacks a clear sentence structure, while “most of people live” has errors in article use and tense. “Population increased came to” combines verbs incorrectly, and “people leaved Manhattan and go” has faulty verb forms and tense consistency. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use past-tense forms consistently when describing historical data. A wider range of accurate sentence patterns would improve clarity.

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