Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The provided table illustrates the changes in the total polulation of New York. The another tabvles show changes in the residents of the five distincts of the city specifically-Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island between 1800 and 2000.

Overall, it is clear that in the population is at peak in 2000, but others table show the precent of population one depicts the manhattan and it peaked in 1800, while other illustrates the remaining cities in year 2000 proprotion peaked at 81%.

Looking at the details, all districts show a significant upward trend, in 1800 the figure stood at 79,216 and rose dramatically to the high of [redacted phone] in 8,009,185 in 2000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the subject and period, and your overview attempts to highlight the overall peak in 2000 and the changing shares of Manhattan and the other districts. However, the response reports very little of the table accurately or clearly. The total population rose from 79,216 to 3,437,202 in 1900 and then to 8,009,185 in 2000; the sentence “rose dramatically to the high of 347202 in 8,009,185” confuses these figures. You also say all districts increased, although Manhattan’s population fell between 1900 and 2000. The key comparisons are therefore missing or misreported, and the response is only 111 words, below the required 150. Add accurate figures and explain the contrasting trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph. “Overall” and “Looking at the details” signal these stages, so the reader can recognise the intended structure. However, the progression is not sustained: the final paragraph gives only one confused comparison and does not develop the overview’s points. Several references are unclear, such as “others table” and “one depicts the manhattan,” making it difficult to follow which table or population share is being discussed. Build a clearer sequence by grouping the total-population figures first, then comparing Manhattan with the other districts, and use precise references such as “the second table” or “Manhattan’s share.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant task vocabulary, including “population,” “districts,” “figure,” “trend” and “proportion,” and attempts to describe change with “rose dramatically” and “peaked.” However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the message harder to understand: “polulation,” “tabvles,” “distincts,” “precent” and “proprotion.” Some expressions are also unnatural, such as “the population is at peak” and “remaining cities,” since these are districts rather than separate cities. Aim for accurate, conventional data-reporting language and check spelling carefully. For example, describe a figure as “reached a peak” and refer to “the other four districts” rather than “remaining cities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few longer structures, including the opening sentence and the overview beginning “Overall,” but control is inconsistent and the final sentence is difficult to parse. Examples include “The another tables show,” where the article and plural form do not work together, and “it is clear that in the population is at peak,” which has an unnecessary preposition and an incomplete grammatical pattern. The sentence “all districts show a significant upward trend” also uses a present-tense form for historical data and makes an inaccurate generalisation. Use straightforward past-tense sentences for the years shown, and check articles, agreement and sentence boundaries. For instance: “The total population rose from 79,216 in 1800 to 3,437,202 in 1900.”

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