Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The first table below shows changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 to 2000. The second and third tables show changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The first table illustrate the changes in the total population of New York City from 1800 and 2000. Whereas, the second and third tables demonstrate changes in the population of the five districts of the city (Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens, Staten Island) over the same period.

Overall, it can be seen that the population more in 2000 in New York. However, the in 2000 the Manhattan had less ratio.

To commence, the New York City all five districts were begin dividing on it. Moreover, in 1800 the population had less compared to in 1900 3,437,202. Furthermore, in 2000 it rose dramatically near 80 lakhs.

On the other hand, in Manhattan the population in 1800 was rising 76% nevertheless in 1900 it drop sadenly approcimately near half 54%. On account of in 2000 the manhattan which become less population at 19%. Secondly, other districts divided in all parts in 1800 the ratio of total had had 24% only while in 1900 it rise marginally from 24 to 46%. Finally, in 2000 the population at peak levels such as, 6,471,089 and the ratio also become hiking significant 81%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the broad contrast between the city’s growth and Manhattan’s declining share, and you include relevant figures such as the other districts’ 6,471,089 residents and 81% share in 2000. However, the overview is unclear (“the population more in 2000”) and does not state the key pattern precisely: the city’s total population rose at both intervals, while Manhattan’s population increased to 1900 and then fell by 2000. Some figures and trends are omitted or imprecisely described, including the total population values and Manhattan’s actual population. The claim that the other districts’ share rose “marginally” is misleading, given its substantial increase from 24% to 81%. A clearer overview and accurate comparisons would make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs, and it attempts to guide the reader with phrases such as “To commence,” “On the other hand,” and “Finally.” However, the progression is difficult to follow because several sentences do not clearly connect their ideas. For example, “the New York City all five districts were begin dividing on it” does not communicate a meaningful comparison, and “Moreover” and “Furthermore” do not establish clear relationships between the figures that follow. The Manhattan and other-district information is grouped together, but the comparisons within each group remain unclear. Organise the report around the overall population trend and then the contrasting district trends, using simpler, more accurate links between sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt a range of trend vocabulary, including “rose dramatically,” “drop,” “marginally,” and “peak levels,” and you use percentage language relevant to the tables. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, which makes some descriptions hard to interpret. Phrases such as “the population more,” “divided on it,” “ratio become hiking significant,” and “population at peak levels” are not natural ways to describe these data. There are also spelling errors, including “sadenly” and “approcimately.” Use precise terms such as “increased,” “declined,” “accounted for,” and “share,” and check spelling. This would help you describe the figures clearly without relying on vague or unsuitable expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast beginning “Whereas” and clauses introduced by “while” and “nevertheless.” However, many sentences contain errors in basic sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, or articles, and these sometimes obscure the intended meaning. For instance, “The first table illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “the population had less compared to in 1900” is not a complete, well-formed comparison. “In 2000 the Manhattan had less ratio” also has an unclear grammatical structure. Some clauses are joined awkwardly, as in “On account of in 2000…” Practise forming complete sentences with accurate past-tense verbs and clear subjects, then use conjunctions to connect comparisons.

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